The Eternal Optimist

Much Ado.....

2012-01-07T07:34:00.005+05:30

Was trying to study this morning, and as is common at these times, I was struck by a thought. I started thinking - what if the structure of an engineering course was similar to that of a medical course.

Think about it, after clearing the competitions, you sit for a counselling that merely decides which college you go to for the next one year. Based on your rank and preference, you get allotted an institute.

Now you go there and you study the usual syllabus for Engg. I year - a little bit of Computer Science, Electronics, Electrical, Mechanical, Chemical Engineering, a little Maths, Physics, Chemistry - you get the idea. Then at the end of the year, based on your performance, you get allotted an engineering stream. If you show aptitude for Civil Engg. but not for Electronics, no matter how high or low your rank in JEE(let's say), you should get Civil Engg. and not Electronics.

This means that there is a higher likelihood that people graduating from an Engg. Institute will work as as engineers or researchers, instead of going for MBAs, etc. because they got to study something that they loved, and not something that was forced upon them.

It will also give us more incentive to study in first year. Engg. grads will know what I mean. Most of us are hardly able to keep up with the syllabus in first year, and we regret it for the remaining 3/4 years we are in college. If we have a choice, if we are allowed to give more attention to subjects we love and just barely pass in others without screwing up our CG, who won't take it?

I think most Engg. students wish for such a system, once they realize that the branch of study allotted to them based on their AIR has nothing to do with their interests and capabilities. So many of us just while our time away in college, because we just don't 'get' what the profs are saying.

A prof once told my class,"The difference between the top ranker and the last ranker is just 10 marks". Think about it.

Bomb blasts in Mumbai - 13 July 2011

2011-07-14T10:41:00.001+05:30

What kinda SICK people do something like this!!?

God and Dog

2010-11-09T09:17:00.000+05:30

Sometimes I feel that when God accidentally pours too much love into a soul, it is born as a Dog.

Scooby

2010-10-17T00:44:00.000+05:30

Scooby is not well. He's got a tumour in his front paw, and it cannot be removed or cured permanently, in spite of repeated efforts. and now, the tumour has spread to other parts too. It seems like he will not survive for long.

Scoobs is a part of our family. He's been with us for more than 10 years now. He came to us as a very weak puppy, nobody expected him to live very long. He had a deformity in his paw due to some deficiency and it was painful to him to put weight on his paw. The vet said that he would not be able to walk or even stand beyond the age of one year. But Scoobs not only survived, but he stood on his own four feet, jumped, ran about and had all the fun in the world. He might be 10 years old, that's 80 dog years, but he has the heart of a baby. He still rolls over like a little pup expecting a tummy rub, or an ear scratch. His eyes still twinkle on seeing us whenever I or B. go home. He still has a voracious appetite. Touchwood. B. tells me that he manages to fool everyone in the house and makes a proper meal out of his early morning snack of two rotis. See, everytime he sees someone go into the kitchen, he starts asking for food. So, Ma will give him a couple of rotis, then the maid, and then B. Then he also gobbles his morning meal at 10. Sometimes he will eat so much that he'll have an upset stomach, but he'll keep eating nevertheless.

Last we heard, he has also begun to understand our language, and not just our gestures or the intonation, and not just dog type commands like 'sit', 'stay', or 'go'. It happened like this. Ma and B. were sitting outside in the verandah and Scooby, as usual, was trying to get them to scratch his ear. He wags his tail a lot when he does this. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Ma says,"Scooby, teen baar poonch hilao." Wag your tail 3 times. And Scooby goes one swish, two swish, three swish, stop.

They thought it was just a coincidence. So B. says,"Scooby, upar dekho." Look up. And Scoobs starts staring at the tubelight.

Again they say,"Scooby, do baar poonch hilao." Wag your tail twice. Scooby goes one, two, stop.

So basically we are convinced that he has begun to understand our language. Too late? We don't think so. We are thrilled that he has.

The Adventures of Shiba -2

2010-09-16T12:18:00.003+05:30

It was their day off, so Timmy proposed a visit to the nearby orphans’ home. “No way am I going there,” Shiba cried. She hated the idea of being pulled down to the ground by a mob of fifty kids, having her hair pulled, and being jumped on like a common pony. Two, three, even five kids she could handle at a time, but the whole house together!

You see, because she did not hit back, or try to scare them away, the kids thought she liked playing with them, but at least Timmy should know better. But the thick-skulled oaf! He always used to leave her with the younger kids and used to go off teaching basketball to the more manageable and definitely more sensible older ones.

“No way! I’m not going there! I’m not, I’m not, I’m not!”

“I know! You do love them very much, don’t you! My good little girl!”

“Owww! The puppy face again! If I was not such a sucker for him, I’d give him a piece of my mind right now,” she thought.

And that’s how they went to the orphanage that day.

This time she tried to stick very close to Timmy. Maybe if she tried to show an interest in his game, he would not throw her to the little bandits.

Oh, this was so easy! You just had to grab the ball, and pass it to Timmy, and he would do the throwing in the hoop, etc. She was good at this. She might even be NBA or whatever material. Their team was winning. Nobody could grab the ball back from her. She was sailing with it. It was so much fun! She had stolen the ball for the last time, and was taking it to Timmy, when she heard a loud sound, very nearby.

“It’s a gunshot,” she cried, and dropped to the floor. She looked around, the morons were still standing, looking very disappointed.

“What! You are worried about your stupid game,” she shouted, “There’s gunfire here!”

Timmy was walking over to her. How can the idiot be so calm! He had a rag in his hand.

“I think you held the ball too tight, Shiba. It burst.”

After that they wouldn’t let her play with them again. “You’re just jealous,” she shouted, but Timmy took her to play with the younger ones.

The smaller kids played in the inner hall during the day. She looked through a crack in the door. They were playing with their dolls and toy cars, behaving like perfect angels. Maybe if I went in very quietly, they won’t notice me, she thought.

And then she smelt it.

It was a strong smell, of blood and cat and death. “Something’s wrong,” she told Timmy.

“What happened?”

“Follow me.”

The smell was coming from the old storehouse, where the Matron kept all kinds of old things. Wrappings the kids were in when they were left here and stuff like that. She said that someday the parents might come to fetch their babies. Shiba didn’t understand this. Wouldn’t the parents just know which baby was theirs, even without the wrapping? But she didn’t say anything. The Matron was a good woman, and if she believed anything, there must be a reason for it.

The door was opened, and there, on a heap of old clothes, was a cat. A dying cat. There were signs of a fight, bite marks and a lot of blood. And there was something else too. Trying to get some milk from her mother was a newborn kitten. There was another still-born lying nearby.

The mother must have smelt them. Her eyes flew open and she snarled. She tried to get up to fight them off, but fell down. Shiba touched the mother’s face, hoping she would be comforted. Surprisingly, she was.

“Take care of my baby,” she said, and suddenly she wasn’t breathing anymore.

She took the kitten outside. “We have to get her some milk,” she told Timmy.

“Are you going to keep it?” he asked. Men can be such idiots sometimes. Of course she was. Didn’t he hear what the mother just said? To take care of her child.

She had laid the kitten out at the door of the storehouse. Suddenly, out of nowhere, there appeared a bunch of young kids. They looked like they wanted to play with the kitten. That made her really mad. She could hear her heart beating at the speed of an express train. She stepped in front of the kitten and would have really told these selfish midgets off, but Timmy held her back.

One little girl came up and set a bowl of milk in front of the kitten. Shiba relaxed. The kitten smelt the milk, and rushed towards it, but she couldn’t drink it. She didn’t know how to. Then the kids said something to each other and a little boy brought a cotton piece. The girl dipped it into the milk and then used it to put drops of milk in the kitten’s mouth. The kids weren’t so foolish after all.

Shiba looked on for another moment, and then moved away. She felt Timmy catch up. “Yeah, it’s going to be okay. The kids will take care of her,” he said.

I know, she thought.

The Adventures of Shiba - 1

2010-09-15T09:48:00.003+05:30

Shiba was tired. Running around the whole day, with only biscuits to subdue her burning hunger, was obviously going to take its toll. But at least it was over and she was finally back home, on her soft rug with a bowl of the most delicious meat in the world. Life was beautiful.

But then, wasn’t it always? She remembered her past lives. She’d been a penguin, a bat, a cuckoo, a sunflower, even a weed once. She remembered how wonderful it always felt in the mornings to the sunflower, and in the evenings to the bat. It’s all perspective, she thought.

Today was like any other day, except that Timmy had forgotten to pack her lunch. Well she’d punished him enough too. She’d made him share his lunch with her. So as an apology, he’d prepared her favorite dinner. Sweet Timmy, how she loved him!

The rest had been wonderful. They had discovered the missing boy and caught the kidnapper. She really enjoyed the part when Timmy gave the bad guy an extra hard thwack. Both of them hated people who harmed kids.

Timmy was such a big softie! She could swear she saw tears in his eyes when the mother hugged her son. But then, Timmy only ever cried in front of her. So she wasn’t gonna make fun of him. Yet. Maybe a couple of days later.

Vaguely she saw Timmy undressing and getting into bed. She snuggled up to him and planted a very wet kiss on his cheek. Good girl, Timmy whispered, and both of them fell asleep.

Unemployed

2010-09-14T11:23:00.001+05:30

8 and a half months of being unemployed is driving me crazy. Hobby suggestions, anyone?

Black Sunday

2010-09-03T11:36:00.004+05:30

This just came in!!

http://www.telegraphindia.com/1100903/jsp/nation/story_12890823.jsp

IIT boy death from campus neglect: Panel
BASANT KUMAR MOHANTY

A picture of Rohit Kumar from an IIT Kharagpur magazine

New Delhi, Sept. 2: A panel inquiring into the death of an IIT Kharagpur student, who suffered brain injury after falling from a rickshaw, has blamed the institute hospital and pulled up Madhusudan Chakraborty, who is now the IIT Bhubaneswar director, The Telegraph has learnt.

The two-member committee has said Rohit Kumar, the third-year BTech student who died on March 22, 2009, when he was being driven to a Calcutta hospital in a non-critical-care ambulance, lost his life because of laxities in health care facilities on the campus, sources said.

Justice Malay Kumar Basu and former IIM Calcutta director Subir Chowdhury rapped Chakraborty, who was then the chairman of the hospital management committee, and said he should have been “more proactive in the administration of the hospital”.

He was also working as the CEO of the IIT Hospital when the incident happened.

Rohit Kumar’s belongings before being taken away from his hostel in March 2009 after his death

The hospital did not have expert doctors and advanced facilities to treat Rohit, the report said. There was no qualified doctor in the ambulance that was taking him to Calcutta, it added. The panel’s report will be discussed at a meeting of the board of governors of IIT Kharagpur on Saturday.

Rohit’s death had sparked protests by students, forcing Damodar Acharya to resign as institute director on “moral grounds”.

Chakraborty, who was deputy director at that time, was designated officiating director. He was later appointed director of IIT Bhubaneswar. Acharya was reinstated as IIT Kharagpur director.

Another committee that the IIT authorities had set up had absolved the hospital doctors, saying their diagnosis was correct.

Students of IIT Kharagpur, who took out a candlelight march to protest Rohit’s death, also demanded the replacement of former Supreme Court judge U.C. Banners, appointed to probe the circumstances that led to the death.

At a meeting with the chairman of the institute’s board of governors on March 27, 2010, the students said they wanted someone not linked with the institute in any way to conduct the probe. “U.C. Banerjee is at the Rajiv Gandhi School of Intellectual Property Law (on the campus) frequently as a guest lecturer. We want him replaced by someone who is an external personality,” said a student.

At the meeting, in which no one except the chairman of the institute — then Tata Steel MD B. Muthuraman — and the students were allowed, he apparently promised the probe would be conducted by an “outsider”. He was also quoted as saying that if Banerjee was in any way connected with the institute, steps would be taken to ensure a “fair external investigation”.

Keeping the students’ demand in mind, a new panel of Justice Basu and IIM Calcutta director Chowdhury was formed.

Bare / Hide

2010-08-03T13:18:00.002+05:30

Recently I was engaged in a very-much-solo mental debate on the Purdah/ Burqa system. This was the line of thought:

Every human being deserves the right to live life on their own terms.
Talibanesque forcing/indoctrination of women to hide their faces is a violation of basic human dignity.
At the other end of the spectrum is the western, and now also Indian, society, where lesser and lesser clothes are fast becoming the norm. Baring all is now cool.
We assume that since India is a free society, these women do what they do of their own free will. But is this true?
What about peer pressure? The need to look 'cool'?
Teens ape movie stars nowadays, it is a known fact. So, kids wear what the stars wear. Is this not a form of indoctrination?
So where is the free will in either case?

Conclusion: Women are hardly free anywhere. If I expand the analogy, no human being is free. We are all prisoners of the society that we create.

Speed Living

2010-08-03T13:16:00.002+05:30

Whoof!! My last post was one week away from my marriage, and it's August already. As if I ever needed proof that time flies!

New Year

2010-01-14T13:43:00.002+05:30

The new year is here and the first month is already half over. How could that be?! Time didn't fly so fast when I was in school. We used to keep waiting and waiting for our summer vacations and they used to take ages to come. And now, already the first month of 2010 is half over, and I am getting married in another week! Could it be possible that the clock ticks faster when you are older and want to stay a 'kid' forever, than when you were younger and wanted to grow up as fast as possible, earn your own money and marry Prince Charming?

Promises

2009-12-14T11:29:00.001+05:30

Promises are usually very hard to keep; but in the end, the promises we do keep are the ones that make us who we are.

The Price of an IITian

2009-12-11T12:35:00.001+05:30

Looking for an IITian bridegroom? Well, the starting price is 20 L.

This is what one of my friends told me recently. Her parents are looking for a husband for her, and these are the market rates. It doesn't matter that the girl herself is an IITian, having just completed her dual degree course at IIT Kharagpur with me. Apparently, IITian girls are still not worth a dime. Makes me feel real glad that mine is gonna be a love marriage and S. and his family are such awsome people, so there is no question of dowry here. But then, I know I would have called off the marriage if this had not been the case.

I don't understand. You can forgive parents for being old fashioned, but what if a person from your own generation tells you that just because you also are an IITian, it doesn't mean that you are better than other girls. What the hell is wrong with us?

No, let me rephrase that. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH US?????

With this mentality, how is an IITian boy any different from a roadside whore, and his parents from pimps? At least, even those women do it to feed their bellies. Does an IITian not earn enough to support himself, his new wife, and his parents on his own? What, then, is the motivation to sell themselves this way?

2009-12-11T12:33:00.001+05:30

The 'Forgettor'

2009-12-10T12:28:00.001+05:30

I have been accused many times of forgetting my friends in my old place, as soon as I shift to a new location. My bf, soon to be h., says that. Recently my mom said it. I don't know how many times my 'forgotten' friends have said it. My Orkut scrapbook is full of scraps asking me when that last time was that I went online. Now, they have also stopped trying.

I wonder if it's true. Am I really a 'Forgetter'? Are there other people like me, people who 'forget'? And why do people 'forget'? Could it be part of a natural process of adjusting to a new surrounding, or mere cold-heartedness?

On Freedom of Speech

2009-12-10T09:06:00.001+05:30

Some time ago, I was thinking about anti-Hindi vomit of Raj Thakeray, and others like him. My first reaction to such people is that they should be banned. Then I thought of this comment by Evelyn Beatrice Hall,"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." Frankly, these people do have the right to vent out their feelings, even though I firmly believe that these feelings are artificially generated.

Then my thoughts turned to another issue - that of Mr. M.F.Hussain's paintings. Does Mr. Hussain have the right to paint nude portraits of other people's goddesses? And are these people justified in resorting to hooliganism to stop the paintings from being exhibited?

Tricky issue, but I will start my analysis with an analogy. Suppose Mr. Hussain had painted, not a Goddess, but a human girl. Let's say he had painted one of his friends' daughter in the nude, without her permission, but also without using her as a live model. That is to say, suppose he had imagined her in his mind this way and painted her, and given the painting the name of that girl. I hope I am making the situation amply clear.

So, in this case, would he have been justified in painting such a thing? Also, how should his friend have reacted upon knowing that such a picture of his daughter has been painted?

Freedom of speech is an important right guaranteed to us by our Constitution, and it is our duty to defend this right, for ourselves and for others. But this right should be exercised with the utmost responsibility. One should be empathetic while making such public statements. While Mr. Hussain has every right to paint what he painted, but as a human being and a fellow Indian, he should have refrained from doing such a thing. Similarly, the anger of the protesters is understandable and justified, but they also should have refrained from hooliganism to gain their end. Finally, the Thackerays of India should stop stoking the mob mentality and, even now, try to become the responsible leaders that India needs and deserves.

Freedom of Speech as a right is useless without responsible and mature citizens.

On Love - 2

2009-08-12T21:57:00.001+05:30

Love is a very weird thing. There are so many different forms of it that we, as mere mortals, can never hope to experience all of them. Love for your parents, your siblings, your spouse, your friends- all these forms are so similar, and yet so different.

Love for parents is perhaps combined with respect and a little desire to rebel. Love for a younger sibling is accompanied by protectiveness and the feeling that you would destroy the world if something ever happens to hurt your little sis/bro (yes B., I would). Love for an older sibling brings a strong sense of protection; that no matter what happens, your big bro/sis will always protect you, be there for you, pamper you when you want to feel like a kid again. Love for a spouse I need not elaborate. Love for a friend binds you in a sort of brotherhood/sisterhood, where you can be yourself in someone’s company and know that they know that they need not pretend to be someone else in yours.

Of all forms of love, there is one that is the purest, and that has the capacity of giving you everlasting joy. In fact, any of the common forms or all of them can (and ultimately, should) be upgraded to it. It is the ultimate Love. Love in its most distilled form. It is the love that does not ask for anything in return for loving. It is happy & self-satisfied in itself. It does not seek promises; it does not want rewards or any sort of gratification. It is content with just the feeling of euphoria that the heart feels in love, and this contentedness, in fact, makes it even more euphoric.

I remember a time when I actually felt that way. But I lost the purity of that love. So I wish the best for all those who are lucky enough to feel this way about someone, and hope that someday I will also feel that love again.

A New Post

2009-08-11T20:47:00.002+05:30

I just realized that my last post here was a couple of centuries ago. So here's a new one, just for the heck of it. :)

So you know now, I AM alive.

Next post coming up soon.

Sunday - update 2

2009-03-26T20:30:00.002+05:30

We're having a silent protest tomorrow morning, 8 am at Gol C, to attract the attention of BOG Chairman Mr. Muthuraman to the fact that Justice U.C. Banerjee is unacceptable to us as the one-man inquiry committee, as he is a visiting faculty at IIT Kharagpur (Rajiv Gandhi School of Intellectual Property Law). Good luck to us.

Sunday - Update

2009-03-26T09:24:00.002+05:30

After protests and candle marches and promises and everything, who does the insti appoint as the one-man inquiry committee to probe into the roles of BC Roy and the administration in Rohit's death? U C Banerjee, the same guy who probed the Godhra carnage and termed it an 'accident'. Wow! Fantastic! Are the authorities out of their collective minds?!! How could they even think that the janta would allow them to appoint someone with such a tainted record to probe this matter?

Sunday

2009-03-25T19:37:00.005+05:30

A lot has happened recently. For details, read:

http://www.scholarsavenue.org/2009/03/22/student-dies-en-route-from-bc-roy-hospital-to-kolkata/

In short, a kid died this Sunday due to medical negligence and administrative apathy. Students, already having lost faith in the Dean, Students' Affairs(DoSA), swarmed in front of the Director's residence hoping for some positive action from him. All they got was the standard beurocratic response of "We'll look into the matter, and punish the doctor responsible." Angry students got frustrated. Here, one of the media-men shooting there, did his trick. He threw a stone at the Director's bunglow. That started a mob reaction, as students broke window panes and the Director's car. After much shouting of slogans, the director resigned from his post late evening.

Since then, we're having committees and meetings and discussions and what not. While the good news is that the students and the administration seems to have woken up, I don't know how long they'll stay awake. The reaction at the Diro's house, while violent and going against everything we've been taught since childhood, was long overdue. Seriously, how can you ignore the voice of the people you are supposed to be helping, and hope to get away unscathed?

That said, I think that there are others in the administration, present and past, who deserved this more than the Director. I mean, that guy was new, while there are other people who have held their posts longer, and have ignored this issue longer, and it is their responsibility more that Rohit died. I think we should really try to make sure that the real culprits are made answerable.

While I should be congratulating my fellow-students for managing to get the authorities to listen to them, it came at a great cost. So, I am back to my favourite question. What if? What if we'd had the guts to protest earlier? Don't try to tell me that boycotting Illu was a 'protest'. We all, including the powers-that-be, know what really motivated that boycott. What if our protest had really been an honest protest? Would this have happened?

To be fair, blaming the janta is wrong here. There have been cases of the Institute making an example of the students who tried to speak up- Schols Ave when they published the story on BC Roy, a KGP drams troupe who presented a play on a politically sensitive issue(I forget the exact theme) and a student representative who tried to expose an embezzlement many years ago. The first two got threatened with DC and the last one, poor guy, last I heard, he was still trying to somehow finish his stay here and move on with life.

Even with all the mistakes of the past, I feel there's still hope. Janta is charged, and is making sure that the authorities will work their a**es off. They're making sure that this is not forgotten. They're assuming an active role in the post-Sunday events. All in all, I think we've learnt our lesson.

Goodbyes

2009-03-15T13:54:00.009+05:30

It's that part of the year again, the part with farewells and goodbyes. For me, the only difference is that this year I am at the receiving end of a farewell. Yep, I've almost finished my sentence here and I am ready to fly out. And as the time to finally leave draws near, my mind bombards me with things I need to say to you guys. It becomes increasingly difficult to remember everything, and there is this tiny nagging fear within me that I might forget something, or just not find the opportunity to speak the words out. That's the primary reason I am writing all this. Please forgive me if I end up sounding too presumptuous, but I really need to make sure that I don't leave anything unsaid, just this once.

First and the most important thing, I love you guys. All the people with whom I have interacted at all, and even those with whom I have not been able to, I love you all. You are my very dear bachhas and ben logs, and I will always cherish the time I got to spend with you. To my super-final year ben log, Deepti,Bothra, Erima, Sheekha, Ketkee, Sreeja, Varada, Sravanthi, Suma, Resham, Smriti, Sunitha and Varsha(see, I did put your name in :P ), thank you for helping me through 5th year. To my juniors, especially the present fourth and final year batch, thanks for being around, guys. I don't know what I would have done without you. It has really been an honour and a priviledge to have you as bachhas and friends.

Now, to the other things that are playing ping-pong in my head.

Life in Kgp can really make or break you, Only one thing is certain, none of us is the same person as she came here. We have learnt, we have evolved, made a lot of mistakes, had a lot of fun, made some friends, some enemies, and we know that some people will never be the same after having known us, just as we'll never be the same having known them.

So, make the most of your 4 or 5 year stay here. Make friends, participate in stuff, learn at least one new skill, and make sure you don't neglect your acads. If you are a tech junkie, build up your departmental funda, tech funda, and make sure you have an IR worth boasting of. Kgp offers you many avenues to exploit your techie inclinations apart from acads. Use them. Others, pick up at least one Soc & Cult activity and one sports event. I not only want to see the S&C and Tech. GCs in SN, I also want to see you fighting for (and getting) slots for the football field and the volley court. And don't you ever let anyone tell you that all this is not possible.

You can get anything and everything you want in life. You got through JEE, didn't you? You qualified the same exam as the rest of Kgp junta, scored higher than a huge percentage of them. What have they got that you don't? Don't let them tell you that the techie stuff is not for girls, or sports is not for girls, or GC or Illu. Don't let sheer numbers, or height, or physical strength overpower you. Find ways over them, under them, around them. Plan your strategy at the beginning of the year. and yeah, work together.

What defines any Hall is not the name, but the people who respond to that name. The people who shout 'SN ka tempo high hai...' The people who slog for weeks to put up a fight in the name of SN. You define SN. But remember, a lone wolf will always be defeated. So move in your pack. Your unity will be your greatest strength. Use it to the full. Don't let groupism and regionalism divide you. Why be a drop when you can be the ocean?

I know this is getting too long, but there are still two events that I keep thinking of. One was way back in my first year. We were out in the Illu arena, working. That year, we'd had huge chatais, bigger than any you guys have yet seen. So, we were wiring, and this senior comes up to us and says,"Kar lo, par SN jitega to nahi." Work, but SN will never win.

Don't you ever say such a thing to your juniors. If you are asking your juniors to spend so much time and energy in an event, the least you can do is fight to win. If you put in an honest effort from your side, you won't be so disheartened when the results don't go as expected, and who knows, some day your juniors will bring the Illu matka to SN.

The second event is my fifth year Holi. Kudos to all my bachhas who dared to participate in matka-phod, even with all the taunts and jeers from the bandas. Kudos to all the people who dared to climb again even after falling down three times. I am really proud of you, for dreaming, daring and fighting.

Urrghhh!

2009-03-11T20:21:00.002+05:30

I am just so frustrated right now; partially the reason is that I don't know why I am feeling so frustrated.

The Story of a Princess-11

2009-01-30T08:08:00.011+05:30

As days passed by, I felt more and more at home in Ayodhya. The people loved us, and I think they even looked forward to Ram as their future ruler. We tried, as much as possible, to keep in touch with them. This meant travelling all the while, living sometimes in palaces and sometimes in tents, sometimes going without sleep and sometimes without food, but we loved this life. The feeling of togetherness that Ram, Laxman and I developed is indescribable.

Ram and I had been in love for a very long time, but with these tours, we also became the best of friends. I came to know about different aspects of Ram's personality, his infinite compassion, his dedication to his people, his sense of right and wrong, of justice, his stubbornness in refusing to accept what he knew to be wrong, the respect that he gave everyone around him, even though he was their prince and they were ordinary people. Of course, I was already familiar with this last trait. This was part of the reason why I fell in love with him in the first place. He never looked down upon anyone and never saw anyone as his inferior, merely because of social position, or age, or, in my case, gender.

With him I never felt constrained. I could speak my mind, attend and participate in meetings, practice archery and swordsmanship, talk to anyone I wanted to talk to. All this was huge for women at that time. I asked him once why he felt so disinclined to follow traditions. "Aryavartta wasn't always like this, Sita",he said,"What you see as traditions aren't really our traditions. If we were truly following our traditions then women in Aryavartta would have been freer than they are now, perhaps even freer than you are right now."

As I looked at him in surprise, he continued,"Barely till a hundred years ago, till my great-grandfather's time, I guess, women were considered as being equal to men in all respects. They were even worshipped in many forms like Durga and Kali. Gradually, for some reason that I don't completely understand yet, their standing in society declined, till they became what you see now- birds caged in traditions, bound by culture. Sita, I am sorry. I am so very sorry."

I was confused. What was he apologising for?

"I try a lot, but I still can't give you the respect that you deserve. I hate the fact that your freedom is so dependent on me being alive. You will be caged like all the others, like my mothers, when I die..."

"Please, if you love me, don't ever say that again. Nothing will happen to you."

"Sita, be practical. I am bringing a war upon myself, a war against Ravan and all that he stands for. It is extremely likely that something will."

"Well, Ram, perhaps you are forgetting that I am fighting that war right alongside you. God forbid, but if something were to happen to you, Sita will die with you in the same battle."

He put his hand on my cheek, and I realized that I had started crying. "Some warrior you will be, crying like this!", he joked, but his voice was shaky. Suddenly we were both thinking about a not very much impossible future.

While the bonding between Ram and me became stronger than ever, I developed a different kind of relationship with Laxman. He was this combination of a kid brother, a son and a friend to me, and I am glad the feeling was mutual. For appearances' sake, like in the royal palace of Ayodhya, in front of my father-in-law and his Council-men, we maintained a very formal relation. But in front of the common people of Ayodhya, and while the three of us were alone, we came back to our normal selves.

This was necessary, this deception, because from what we had seen of the Council and the King, Laxman would have been separated from us if they came to know that he was so close to me. Neither Ram nor I could bear the thought of not having Laxman around. The respect that he gave us and the love he evoked in our hearts are beyond belief. Moreover, his quick wit always kept the atmosphere lively. He also had a very strong sense of justice, much like Ram and me, but with a little more anger.

Once we came upon a village that had been destroyed in an attack from beyond the border, just the night before. From what we'd heard, the attackers were a small group, not more than fifteen. So Ram asked Laxman to take a few men and go after them. This was the first time he was commanding a mission. It would have been natural for him to show off by taking too few, or too many, men. But it would have jeopardized his mission and the culprits could escape. For Laxman, at that moment, catching those people was the most important thing in the world. The destruction he'd seen in the village had caused him a lot of pain. He would never let petty pride stand in his way of delivering justice. He took twelve people, just the right number to defeat them in combat, and to not become a burden in the chase.

He brought most of the murderers back alive. I was amazed at his self-restriant. To be Laxman, to have seen the brutality with which the poor villagers were murdered by these gutless goons, and to still have resisted the urge to kill them in battle, to bring them to the court of Ram to get justice, this kid was growing up!

I was looking at him and thinking all this, and I guess my thoughts must have shown on my face, because he said,"What?! They surrendered! I had no choice but to bring them back alive. You know I don't have Ram's self-control!"

I laughed. Laxman was still Laxman.

Random Thoughts-2

2009-01-29T08:59:00.003+05:30

Jai Hind! might have become Yo India!, but it's still Our India that we are cheering.

Random Thoughts-1

2009-01-27T13:04:00.003+05:30

There's no such thing as fiction. What is fiction for one person, might be reality for another. I mean, honestly, haven't we always, at one level or another, identified with some of the characters in a play, a movie, a novel? Is it so far off to imagine, then, that the story might really be someone's life history, somewhere? I believe Devdas to be the epitome of a loser, but don't we see so many people around us acting like him, thinking themselves to be some kind of tragic heroes? Is it impossible that Devdas, a purely fictional character, might be inspired by a true tale?

On Mumbai n Patna

2008-11-16T11:24:00.005+05:30

Uff...exam ke time bhi chain nahi milega kya? neways, here's a peep into what's not been letting me concentrate half the day.

Regarding the chaos in Mumbai, I find myself agreeing with the Mumbai janta. Please note the 'Mumbai janta'. The Mumbai janta, which includes the Marathis and also the non-Marathis, have a point. However, that point has been twisted beyond recognition by Mr. Raj Thackeray and Mr. Lalu Prasad Yadav and the rest of UPite-Bihari Politicians. The point that Mumbai janta wants to make to the rest of the nation and the powers that be, is that Mumbai is filled to capacity, and has reached a limit where it can't accomodate any more people.

Every city has a limit to its growth, decided mainly by its population, level of industrialization, resource utilization, pollution and availability of food. For details, check out Limits to Growth by Meadows, Meadows, Randers and Behrens. It discusses the whole earth as the system, but we can easily make the analogy to a city. So, beyond this limit, the city cannot grow. Beyond this limit, the general living conditions start deteriorating as the same amount of resources, etc. gets divided amongst more people. So what the Mumbai janta wants to say is that Mumbai has reached its limit. No. Let me make a correction. MUMBAI HAS REACHED ITS LIMIT. There, that's better.

So, if Mr. Raj Thackeray really wants to help Mumbai, he should stop all this gunda-gardi, 'cos ultimately that's what it is, in the name of Marathi Sanskriti and get down to some solid work. Getting the government to develop new satellite cities to support Mumbai would be a good idea. Hell, it would be the best! It's working for New Delhi, isn't it?

So now that we've discussed that part of the issue, let's come to the second half. Mr. Raj Thackeray seems to have given the UP-Bihar politicians the best B'day gift possible. He has given them another non-issue, namely Marathi-bashing, to get over the elections. भाई, काम तो कुछ किया नहीं है पिछले २० सालों से. लालू जी, आपकी सरकार कितने साल रही है बिहार में? १५ साल या कुछ था न नम्बर? With no development and increasing lawlessness for more than 15 years, Bihar is indeed in a deplorable state. तो बिहारी जनता migrate नहीं करेगी तो क्या करेगी? पर बिहारी नेताओं को इस बात से कुछ फर्क थोड़े ही ना पड़ता है. काम नहीं किया तो क्या हुआ, अब बस एक-दो गरम-गरम speeches देंगे, बिहारियों का खून खौलायेंगे, २-३ train जलवायेंगे , votes तो मिल ही जायेंगे.

I Am An INDIAN

2008-11-13T09:27:00.002+05:30

The recent upheavals in the country's politics are driving me crazy. Suddenly, some people have become Hindi-speaking and some have become Marathi-speaking, some have become Assamese and some are Kashmiri Muslims and Kashmiri Hindus. And oh! Some are Hindus and Muslims and Christians too. And suddenly some people have discovered that the rest of the world is out to get them, that if they don't go out on a rampage, they are gonna get destroyed by the evil world! The doofuses don't even realise that they are being manipulated by the politicians for votes. Or maybe they do. Maybe they just don't care anymore, so long as they can blame their personal failures on someone else.

You know what hurts me even more? It's when educated people, supposedly intelligent people, speak that way. You may be my best friend but if you think in one language and I think in some other language, you will not welcome me into your home. You will shoo me away at the door.

Well, I refuse. I refuse to be a Hindu or a Muslim or a Christian or a Sikh or of any other faith. I refuse to belong to U.P. or Bengal or Bihar or Tamil Nadu or Maharashtra or to any other region. I refuse to be considered a Kannada-speaking person or a Marathi-speaking person or a Hindi-speaking person. I refuse to be a Brahmin or a Scheduled caste person. I REFUSE. I will not belong to a part when I can belong to a whole.

My name's Kanika, and I am an Indian. I refuse to be part of any other country. I refuse to belong to any other religion or region. I refuse to speak any other language. I am an Indian.

सिर्फ़ एक सवाल

2008-10-25T16:03:00.002+05:30

मेरा तुम दोनों से सिर्फ़ एक सवाल है, राम और सीता। तुम दोनों ने अपनी सारी ज़िन्दगी समाज के नाम कर दी। चौदह साल का वनवास झेला, ताकि तुम रावन को खत्म कर सको। यूँ तो शादी के एक-आध साल बाद ही अपना परिवार शुरू कर देते हैं लोग, पर तुमने चौदह साल ख़ुद को संतान के सुख से वंचित रखा, ताकि तुम अपने लक्ष्य में कामयाब हो सको। यहाँ तक कि तुम दोनों को एक दूसरे से विरह कि यंत्रणा भी झेलनी पड़ी। सीता को रावन के हाथों अपना अपमान सहना पड़ा। सीता, न जाने रावण ने तुम्हें कितने दुःख दिए होंगे लंका में। राम, उस युद्ध में तुमने कितनी बार अपने शरीर को कटवाया होगा, कितना खून बहाया होगा, कितनी पीडा सही होगी। मेरा सवाल यह है: इतना सब कर के भी तुम्हें क्या मिला? सीता, तुम्हारे ऊपर लांछन लगाया गया, तुम्हारे सतीत्व को नकारा गया। राम, तुम्हारे सामने तुम्हारी पत्नी का अपमान किया गया। तुम्हें मजबूर किया गया कि तुम उसे त्याग दो। और ये सब रावण ने नही किया। ये सब किया उन्ही लोगों ने जिनके लिए तुम दोनों ने दुनिया के सब सुखों का त्याग किया था। तो बताओ मुझे, राम और सीता, तुम्हें क्या मिला?

The Story of a Princess-10- The War Meeting

2008-09-29T00:03:00.001+05:30

Laxman: Do you think father will allow it?

Ram: He’ll have to. She has as much right to be there as you and I have.

L: You can’t seriously say that to father! He’ll throw both of us out!

R: I can still reason with him.

L: Ask nicely. If you ask, he might allow.

R: Yeah, I will.

I don’t know how Ram got King Dasrath to allow me to attend the war meeting, but he managed somehow. I had a feeling that he had a lot of help from Mother Sumitra.

The meeting turned out to be a farce.

Ram formally opened the meeting by greeting everyone and introducing us to one another. He then proceeded to explain to them why the meeting had been called. He talked at length about Jansthan and about Ravan and his Rakshasas. He stressed the need for military action to stop the rakshasas from killing innocent people.

He might as well have been talking to stone walls. The Council did not want to open hostilities with Lanka. Ayodhya could not afford to anger Ravan. It was better for everyone if they just sat tight and let the wind blow over.

Ram: I cannot believe this! I found more courage among the simple tribals of Jansthan, who did not even know how to use a bow, than I find in this Council today.

Counselor 1: Those tribals did not have the responsibility of an entire kingdom on their hands, Ram. If we fight and if we lose, Ravan won’t leave a single citizen of Ayodhya alive.

R: But we don’t have to lose!

C2: With Ravan as strong as he is, it is highly likely that we will, Ram.

I: What do you think will happen if we don’t fight, Counselor? Ravan is spreading his tentacles. Before we realize it, he will be storming our doors.

C3: Well, we could have a peace treaty with Lanka…

L: What? A peace treaty with someone like Ravan?! After his rakshasas so brutally murdered our innocent citizens?

R: I agree with Laxman. A peace treaty is out of the question with those cannibals. We have to fight him.

C2: Ram, Jansthan might have been a freak accident. Why make an opinion….?

R: An accident? Hundreds of people killed, even children, their insides ripped out, their flesh roasted in the kitchens of Ravan’s generals, the women raped, tortured and killed to satisfy the lust of the rakshasas, and you still think it was an accident?

His skin was glowing again. I think it was the adrenaline that did this.

C2: We have to assume it was. Or do you want that what happened in Jansthan should happen to the entire Aryavarta? We cannot afford to irk Ravan. I am sure the council agrees with me on this.

There was a collective assent and Ram could say no more. The meeting was concluded.

The Story of a Princess-9

2008-09-28T23:58:00.001+05:30

Even after the wedding celebrations got over, we continued our evening excursions. The courtiers, who had initially thought this to be a passing phase, now started raising objections. They started with the issue of security. As the crown prince, it was Ram’s duty to take his personal safety seriously. And was it right to risk the life of his wife and his younger brother this way? Ram could have said that he could very well protect his wife and his younger brother against any enemy, and he would not have been making an overstatement. But he was not given to making such proud remarks, even if he knew them to be true. As usual, Laxman came to his rescue, “I can protect my bhaiya and bhabhi without any help. No harm can come to them while I am alive. Bhaiya won’t even need to string his bow. I can single-handedly destroy all his enemies”. (Later, when the three of us were alone, he said, “I just said all that to shut those people up. So you two, don’t go about getting into trouble, all right?” It had been a really long time since the all of us had laughed so hard.)

Their second objection was me. Was it appropriate for a lady of the royal family to walk among the commoners so? Was it right for the future Queen to appear before men not her kin, without a veil? Was it appropriate for her to interact with male strangers at all? I could feel my ears burning. What were these people implying? Suddenly Ram spoke up. Why should Sita, or any other woman, have to cover her face? Why should she feel shame in talking to men? Why can’t she hold her head up high and feel proud to be a woman? She is a daughter of the same Mother as we are, Mother Earth, for whom all her children are equally precious.

Ram’s skin has a natural blue glow about it, but now it had turned a beautiful, dark blue. This took my mind completely off everything else. I looked around, but it seemed like no one else had noticed anything. The council-men were muttering. While it was all right for Ram to talk about respecting women and treating them as equals, we should not forget the threat posed by Ravan and his rakshasas , who given half a chance, will destroy everything we hold dear. We ask women, and particularly Princess Sita, to stay indoors for their own protection.

“Princess Sita can protect herself!”

Who said that? And why is everyone looking at me like that? Did I say that? Shut up, you fool! You’re only making a bad situation worse. But I couldn’t stop. “Princess Sita can protect herself. She has been trained in the art of war. She will not be confined indoors.” With that I walked out. Behind me, I could hear the meeting getting concluded.

“Well spoken,” that was Ram. “Yeah, but the council wasn’t happy”. Laxman. “I don’t care”. Me.

Later.

Ram: Sita…

I: Yes?

R: Will you do something for me?

I: Why is that even a question? You know I will if I can.

R: I know, but this is somewhat different….

I: Say it, Ram.

Sita, I know you were trained by the best teachers in Mithila. You were given all the arms training that is only imparted to princes these days.

I: Yes….

R: And I know that if you were to take up a bow, there are very few warriors in Aryavarta who can stand up against you….

I: I am nowhere as good as that….

R: Shut up! I saw a couple of you practice sessions in Mithila..

I(taken aback): How? When?

R(smiling now): Let’s just say that you are not the only expert at disguises around here. The point is, you are among the best warriors I have ever seen, and believe me, I have seen my fair share.

I: Okkk….so?

R: Well, Sita, I want you to promise me that you won’t take up arms in the war that I am foreseeing, unless I specifically ask you to….

I: What? But why? If I can…

R: I can’t explain. It’s just that….wars with rakshasas get very ugly and….well thay don’t always fight fair…and they don’t always kill quickly. They don’t have any humanity. Just….just do it for me, will you?

I: Ok Ram. I promise. But you’ll also have to promise me two things.

R: What?

I: If there is the need, you wont think twice before asking me to fight.

R: I won’t. I promise.

I: And Ram…

R: Yes?

I: Promise me you’ll protect my honor before my life?

R: I’ll….I’ll always protect you.

The Story of a Princess-8

2008-09-28T23:34:00.004+05:30

They were right. Life does get very formal after marriage, especially if you marry the crown prince of Ayodhya. But you will never know, because you won’t ever get to marry him really; not because you and he are so distant in time and space, but because he swore by the holy fire of the yajna and by his own honor as a man, that he will not have a second wife as long as he lived. And I know Ram. He’ll keep his word.

Funny thing is, I never asked to be the only woman in his life. Later when I asked him why he took that oath, he gave a sad smile and said, “You are now in the royal house of Ayodhya. You’ll find out soon enough.”

The next few days were very hectic. With the first rays of the sun, prayers and chants would start, seeking God’s blessings for the ‘newly married couple’. These prayers always made me want to laugh-they asked that Ram may have the strength to protect me and kingdom, that he may have the courage in battle, that he may rule his people justly, that he may have a long life, and on and on and on. And me? Well they prayed that I may give birth to strong sons. Wow! So much for my ‘future role as the Queen of Ayodhya’!

The prayers got over about mid-day. After a brief period of rest, we would meet the courtiers and generals of Ayodhya who were coming from different parts of the kingdom to congratulate their future king (and queen). On the first day, Ram and Laxman gave their account of the situation in Jansthan, and then it was decided to have a full-fledged war-meeting on the issue as soon as everyone had assembled at Ayodhya.

Ram refused to have anything scheduled for our evenings. I can only imagine the knowing smiles and the winks and the silent laughter of the courtiers and the priests when he expressed his disinclination. But this was our decision. We wanted to spend the evenings out in the streets of Ayodhya, getting to know the people. And Ram stubbornly refused to have any guard accompany us either. “I don’t want to intimidate the people. I don’t want them to fear me. I want them to see me as one of their own,” he said. Laxman, being Laxman, insisted on accompanying us. Well, we would have asked him to come along anyway.

These evenings were delightful. The people seemed to love these two brothers genuinely. To my relief, they accepted me instantly. They would meet us, greet us with love, bless us, ask us the news from Jansthan, about Mithila, whether it is really as beautiful a city as people say it is and how I liked Ayodhya. They would tell us of their own lives. Ram made it a point to ask them about their problems, offered solutions where he thought they could deal with it themselves. Otherwise the first thing he did after we got back to the palace was to give orders that the problem be dealt with immediately. I couldn’t help thinking that he would make an amazing ruler.

We were growing in popularity. Everyday we found more and more people coming for us for help. We tried not to disappoint anyone. Whoever came to us with a request was satisfied. I did not care anymore that the priests and the royal family only considered me useful enough to produce heirs to the throne. Because of the love of my people and the respect and love that Ram gave me, I was already the uncrowned queen of Ayodhya’s people.

The Story of a Princess-7

2008-08-24T16:35:00.009+05:30

Look at how you've grown, little one! You were but a dream just a while ago, an idea, a concept, a hope. And look at you now, with dreams and plans and hopes of your own! You were born of a tear from your mother's eye, when she could no longer bear the degradation of her human children. Like a piece of light you had floated down from her, taking all her pain in your own tiny little heart. You had given her hope, you had restored her faith for a while longer. She watched over you, nervously, as you grew up; she tried to teach you, little by little, of the purpose of life, the purpose of your life, the purpose of all life, all the while afraid that she might slip and reveal too much, or explain too less. And now, you, my daughter, know everything. There is nothing more I can, or rather I should, tell you.

Yes, you are my daughter. You are a Dharti-putri. Don't be amazed, or ashamed, or proud of this. I am the mother of all beings. They are born of me, I nourish them and when they die, they come and sleep in my lap. But you are different too, in the sense that you can feel what I feel, and you should never forget this. You were born of my pain and sorrow. I am sorry that I could give you nothing besides. I am sorry that you will have to deal with more than your fair share of pain. I am sorry that in spite of being your mother, I cannot help you. This pain is your destiny.

But not right now. Tonight I have come to give you a gift that I give to all my daughters, be they she-wolves or hens, the ability to create life, to give love and to nurture, the way I have nurtured you all these years. Always remember, any of my children can destroy existence, but only you, my daughters, can bring it into being.

But you, Sita, Queen-to-be, have an additional burden. You have to make sure that the children of earth live together in harmony, that the strong protect the weak, not oppress them. And to do this, you might have to fight either a battle or a war. That depends on how soon the lesson is learnt by those who need it. I also charge you to remember that justice must prevail at all costs, since you are going to be the Queen of more than a mere earthly kingdom. And to this Queen I give these: the freshness of morning air, the experience, stability and tolerance of earth, the wisdom of the stars who see all, the resourcefulness of a river, the brilliance of fire and the swiftness of lightning. May they be of use to you.

When you wake up, you will remember this meeting only vaguely, but it will come back to you as time progresses. Meanwhile, enjoy your married life that starts tomorrow. Ram is a good man. Even I couldn't have chosen better. Farewell child. Be happy, while you still can.

I don't remember the words, only their meaning. I couldn't say what language she spoke. I only remember the sound of a mountain stream and twittering birds, perhaps a bee or two, a strange scent, like that of grass. Even now she speaks in the same language.

CL

2008-08-06T12:32:00.002+05:30

CL, as the Central Library is known to us KGPians, has just undergone a facelift, and it is looking beautiful.I went there today, and I realized, I have just one year left to enjoy it. Now, I am not a 'muggu', not by a long shot, but I think I am really gonna miss our CL. I mean, which other library allows its users to keep the books for months? Usually they need the books to be re-issued every 4-5 day, or a week. And yes, it is the biggest technical library in Asia. One could spend a lifetime in there if one wanted to. I'll miss the freedom it gave me and the opportunity it offered me. I'll miss the sofas in the newspaper corner. I'll miss the journal section. The collection there has always amazed me. God, it's the end already!!!!

Convo Live!!!

2008-07-23T19:14:00.002+05:30

Wed, July 23'08, 7:15 pm
Convocation on 25th, and most of my ben log coming to attend. P. is already here, A. and S. on the move. D. has also moved out of her amchi Mumbai, and is on the way here. L. arrived yesterday only with a big surprise for her BF on his B'day( we're still waiting for a bite of the huge cake dear L. :) ). Sr. has left Kota for Kgp Sweet Kgp. No news of Po. though. Wonder where she is. That leaves me, a fifth year student now and an attending-convo-from-the-visitors'-gallery person with a huge dilemma: how to make the sleeping arrangements. My vella wingies don't mind throwing me out of my room, as they have repeatedly assured me. WOW! This is gonna be fun. Been waiting for this a long time.

D.O.

2008-07-22T16:47:00.003+05:30

This appeared in the Times Of India, Tuesday, August 14, 2007, for their Lead India initiative. I am putting it up here partly because I think everyone should look at it again, and partly because I can't store the paper anymore.

D.O.

Two simple letters.

Place them side by side however,
and they form a word potent enough
to turn a mass of people into a nation.

Do.

The last time we decided to Do or Die
it changed the map of the world. Today,
the eyes of the world are on us again.

So what are we going to do?

How are we going to turn from a land
of philosophers into a nation of do-ers?

Are we going to keep thinking about
what we should be doing or do
something about what we're thinking?

Are we going to simply shrug our
shoulders, blame our infrastructure, our
bureaucracy and our political system?

Or are we going to roll up our sleeves,
get up and actually do something
about it?

The truth is this.

Thinking can happen from an armchair.
But doing must happen on your feet.

Thinking may be a great way of
getting things started. But doing is the
only way to get things done.

And let's face it. You are never really
caught in a traffic jam.

You are the traffic jam.

Today we are in our 60th year of
independence. That works out to more than half a century.

And we're still happy being called
a potential superpower, an emerging
economy or a sleeping tiger?

THIS MUST CHANGE.

AND IT'S ONLY POSSIBLE IF SOME OF US SEIZE
THE DAY AND DARE TO BE THE CHANGE.

So let's stop basking in our glorious
past or daydreaming about our great
future. Let's start by dominating today.

And domination starts with DO.

The Power of Suggestion

2008-07-22T14:57:00.003+05:30

It's almost official. Patients with serious illnesses show signs of improving health when they believe that the sugar pill they are taking is actually a new miracle medicine. Scientists call this the power of suggestion. But of course, we've known it all along. Take the reverse case. Consider hypochondriacs. Someone tells them that they don't look so good, and they'll actually start feeling down and ill. They'll go to a doctor, who, if he/she knows their medical history, will give them some sugar pills and they'll start feeling better. It's not really their fault, but don't we make so much fun of such people?

We see it in practice daily, this awesome power of suggestion. Two very close friends will suddenly start feeling differently for each other when their other common friends tell them that perhaps, maybe, probably, definitely, they like each other, or, even better, the other person loves them. Classic matchmaking. Amazing.

A dress in a shop. You pass by without giving it a second glance. But someone suddenly says,"Hey! That's a nice dress." and you suddenly realize, "Hey! It is!"

A new song. You hear it once. It's okay. Then you meet someone and they are completely in love with this song. The next time you hear it, you're like,"That's a nice song! How come I didn't notice it before?!"

A guy/girl you've been 'just' friends with for a very long time, and honest to God, they're nice, but you don't look at them that way. Then somebody comes along and tells you what they like in them, and suddenly, you start liking them too. Or, someone you really think you love, and then your very close friend tells you that the person has so many faults, and you realize, "How have I been living with person for so long?!" I'm sounding repetitive now, right?

We can't escape this power. We're either the suggestor or the suggestee, for lack of better words. So here I am, suggesting this to whoever bothers to read all this: this is such a nice blog. Why don't you leave some nice comments here? It will give me such a nicey-nice feeling if you did. :) hehe

The Story of a Princess-6

2008-07-18T08:48:00.004+05:30

They would be trying out their strength at the bow in exactly one week. Till then father had arranged for them to be involved in activities like hunting, sight-seeing, etc. to keep them from getting bored. Also, I suspect he wanted to delay his own disappointment as much as possible. He seemed to have grown somewhat fond of them. It was natural for anyone to like them, but my father was not just anyone. He was my father, and I could not help feeling a pang of jealousy for these outsiders.

Anyhow, I met them sometimes in the gardens. We made a lively threesome, when we were sure of our privacy, squabbling over every issue under the sun. That is, I and Lakshman squabbled, Ram tried his best to maintain his composure and his wise demeanor, but we usually managed to pull him in. It wasn't so difficult, given my somewhat radical views and Lakshman's temper, and Ram's own somewhat rigid sense of right and wrong. Our discussions usually left all three of us shaken at the end.

R.: Tomorrow.

I: What?

R.: Tomorrow all this ends.

Lakshman suddenly became serious. I was still not getting it.

I: What ends?

L.: Our friendship, what else?

I: Why? Have you decided not to break the bow after all?

R.: You know that's not possible.

I: Yes. The bow can't be left for Ravan to use.

I used to love taunting him like this, 'cos he could not protest this in front of his younger brother. Lakshman had once commented, " This is the first time I am seeing a girl making a guy blush." But today Ram didn't take the bait. I was confused. I looked from one to the other.

R.: After marriage, a girl is expected to behave in a certain way with her in-laws. You cannot joke and jump there as you do here.

I: Do you think I behave this way with everyone? You are the first real friends I've ever had.

Ram and Lakshman looked at each other.

L.: What he means is that you won't even be able to do that with us.

I: Why?

L.: Hasn't anybody told you anything yet?

I: You forget, you are talking to a motherless child.

L.: I am sorry. I didn't mean that.

I: I know. It's okay.

L.: See, after marriage, you'll become my Bhabhi. Our relation will become a lot more formal.

R.: And you will become my wife and the future queen of Ayodhya. There will be a lot of expectations from us. We'll be required to behave in a certain way.....

I: I get it. Tomorrow it all ends.

The cheerful atmosphere seemed to have evaporated. We all looked at the setting sun. Soon it would be time for me to leave.

R.: There's one more thing that I need to tell you, and it's important that I do this before tomorrow.

I: Go ahead.

R.: While we were in Jansthan, I and Lakshman decided that the only way to bring peace to those people was to uproot the might of Ravan. But even with the entire strength of Ayodhya, it might take around 5-10 years to bring this about.

I: So your point is...?

R.: My point is: would you be willing to marry someone who would be absent from your life for such a long time? I might not be able to give you the bliss of family life at all, 'cos I will not return till Ravan is defeated.

I: Oh! You mean, you plan to leave me behind?

R.: Why should it be otherwise? Battlefield is no place for.....oh! I am sorry. We've argued over that before.

I: Good, you remember! Now, I will give you two choices: If you decide to string that bow tomorrow, rest assured that I will accompany you every step of your life. I will walk with you through Hell if that's what it takes to bring Ravan down. If you think that that's not the way a Queen should behave, then you are free not to string the bow. I will personally go one night and destroy it so nobody can use it, and that will complete this part of your mission.

R.: No. You are right. A Queen has as much responsibility towards her people as a King, and slightly more, because she's the one who guides the king in times of darkness. My Lady, I would be honored to have you as my Queen.

L.: She reminds me of mother Sumitra. They're fire, both of them. But tell me this Sita, who will rule the kingdom in the absence of Ram? And Ram, wouldn't it be better that she does? She would be much better than me or Bharat or Shatrughan.

R.: Yes she would. But it is her choice. Either of you or Bharat would be good for the job, in case she decides not to. Shatrughan is too young.

L.: I am not leaving your side. You really think you could do it on your own?

I: And neither am I. I happen to know some medicine, in addition to archery. You will find me useful in your task.

R.: So, now it only remains to convince Bharat somehow.

He said it with such a straight face that we started laughing. Of course, it would not be an easy task convincing Bharat. But we could worry about that later, when time came.

Just Like That

2008-07-17T21:26:00.003+05:30

Is it really wrong to hope for some sanity in your life? My mind is in turmoil and I don't even know the reason. There's some sort of sadness and don't know the source. I think it's time for a trip home. Even worms need their little holes to crawl into. Why should people be any different?

The Story of a Princess-5

2008-07-13T18:27:00.009+05:30

They finally reached Mithila. I looked on from one of the palace windows as my father welcomed them. They were dressed like jungle-folk, but their bearing told me that they were the princes I had heard so many stories about. Mithila had been buzzing with excitement ever since the news of their coming reached here. Vishwamithra looked like an old man drunk with the wine of youth. There was a spring in his step and a sparkle in his eyes. The younger brother was about my age, and his face shone with the pride of a boy who had just bagged his first buck. Though in his case the 'buck' was probably a rakshas or two, as I had been told by my maids. Nevertheless, he was still much a boy. It was the older brother who really had everybody's attention. He was not the handsomest guy I'd ever seen. No. That would be his brother, once he grew up. There was no pride on his face at his recent feats. His face portrayed calm and serenity, but there was a pain hidden deep in his eyes, and suddenly I realized, he was looking right at me. I saw my father turning around to follow his gaze, and suddenly I was running, running back to my room to still my trembling heart.

"So, did you like him?", it was the Spirit again.

I: Go away.

S.: Yes. I think I'll do that. I think I'll take a stroll in the garden, smell the flowers, feel the grass....

I: Can you actually do that? Smell and feel, I mean?

S.: Why shouldn't I?

I: I mean, you are not, y'know, solid. You are like a ghost-thing, a spirit.

S.: Girl, I am the flower, I am the smell, I am the grass, I am the breeze, I am the trembling of your heart, I am the gaze of his eyes, I am the pain in his heart, I am the fall of his feet on the grass.....

I: He's in the garden?!

S.: Here I am explaining to her the greatest mystery of life and she's only interested in a blue-colored boy! Why, yes. He is in the garden.

I: Why didn't you tell me before?

I quickly changed into my disguise and ran out. I found him at the deep end of the garden with his brother. They were walking and discussing something. He looked extremely disturbed. I sneaked closer to listen.

R.: It's just that, how can I marry a girl knowing that my heart belongs to another?

I: Oh no!!

L.: You don't even know who this girl is! You just saw her once and then she disappeared. She might be anyone. She might even be married!

R.: Don't say that!

L.: I am sorry brother, but you know that we have to destroy Shiva's bow, and you are the only one who can do that.

I: So that's why you came here. For the bow! Not for me. For the bow.

I was so angry, I got careless. It was only the slightest sound, but they had been living in the jungle for months, where they probably had to be on the alert always for survival. They started searching around. I had no choice but to step out, to avoid being exposed.

I(bowing low): My lords, is something wrong?

L.: We heard someone. We thought someone was hiding around, but it was probably you. What are you doing here anyways? Has the King sent any message?

I: No, my lord.

L.: Then?

I: The princess asked me to fetch a particular flower, that she's very fond of, from the garden. I came here to get it.

L.: I don't see any flowers in this part of the garden. There're only fruit trees here. Tell me, why are you here?

I was so angry I was finding it difficult to keep my eyes downcast, as is wont of servants.

I: I am new here. I don't know my way around. I am sorry if I disturbed you. I'll go now.

L.: I don't think so.....

For the first time, he spoke," Leave her be, Lakshman." We both heard the tremor in his voice and looked at him. He looked as if he'd seen a ghost.

R.: Forgive my brother, Lady. Our experiences in the forest have made him too cautious.

I: Yes. I have heard stories about you, how you went to the jungle to fight the rakshasas, but they were never complete. If I might be so bold to ask, what happened out there?

L.: Don't you have an errand to run?

I: Yes. Yes, I am sorry. I'll leave now.

I was hurt, and it must have shown on my face because both of them spoke at the same time,

R.: Please, wait!

L.: I'm sorry.

And for the next half an hour or so, they told me of their adventures in Jansthan and the forest, how the people were terrorized by some rakshasas and how Vishwamithra came to their father to ask for a loan of his son, Ram.

L.: Father did not want Ram to go, him being his favorite 'n all, but he'd given his word. Then mother Sumitra told him that it was his duty as the king to protect his people. And she said to me," Lakshman, go with your brother." No hesitation, no motherly tears. Just like that.

R.: Mother Sumitra is a very strong woman. She is fire. It's a pity that society does not allow a woman to rule a kingdom.

L.: Yes. She would have made a great leader, especially now.

I: Why now?

L.: Well, Ravan is spreading his tentacles wider now, isn't he? He plans to annex all of Aryavart. Already he has started terrorizing the poor jungle-folk and the smaller kingdoms. His rakshasas sneak up in the dead of the night, burn entire villages and go away.

R.: We reached one such village in the morning. The cottages were still smouldering. There was stench of burning flesh all over. Most of the people had not been able to escape their burning homes, and they were the lucky ones.

I: Why?

They looked at each other. I knew they were debating whether to tell me all of it or not.Then Ram spoke,"Some people escaped the fire. They were captured and taken to the forest. We found their tortured and mutilated bodies some distance away." There was so much anguish in his eyes as if he could somehow physically feel their pain. And somehow, through him, I could too. It was so intense I found myself crying.

I: So did you capture the culprits?

L.: No we didn't. We killed them in battle.

I: Just the two of you?

L.: Well, I was all for it. But Ram here decided to organize the villagers and forest-folk into a small fighting unit. We sent out messengers to everyone to meet up at Jansthan. They were hesitant initially, afraid that we would not win, that the rakshasas would take revenge on them afterwards. But eventually most of them came.

R.: They had been trampled on for too long. They had totally lost faith in themselves. Fear does that to people. Our biggest challenge was to remove that fear. That's why organizing them to fight back was essential. We might have fought the rakshasas alone. We might even have won. But new rakshasas would have come as soon as we left, knowing that the people were weak and afraid. But now they will think twice before attacking any village, because they know that the villagers and jungle-folk would unite immediately to drive them out of their holes and slay them.

L.: You should have seen the change that came over them. Suddenly those meek and trembling men and women lost their fear. They had a new determination in their eyes. The very thought of fighting for their freedom seemed to have freed them.

I: I should have liked to have been there.

L.: And what would you have done there?

I: Fought alongside you, of course. Didn't you say the women fought too?

L.: The women took care of the food and the injured. The battlefield is not meant for them.

I: The battlefield is not meant for anyone, man or woman. But when someone attacks your freedom, you have to fight back the best you can, otherwise you may lose it forever. You cannot afford to wait for someone else to come and save the day.

R(in a strange voice): Who are you, Lady? No common servant-girl can have the guts you have, talking to two strange men so frankly, nor the wisdom, saying the things you have said.

L.: Nor would she carry around a dagger hidden in her clothes!

With that he cut the string holding the dagger which fell down, and tried to hold my hands behind me. Now, he could have been rude to me and I would have forgiven him, but no man touches me. No one. With one move I threw him down and jumped some distance away. All this while Ram hadn't said a word. I addressed him now.

I: Prince Ram, I am not your enemy. But may I count you as my friend?

R.: Friends don't come under disguises, Princess. But since you have asked for our friendship, you shall certainly have it.

L.: What?! You're the Princess Sita?! But why the disguise in your own palace?

I: Think.

R.: I guess you wanted to know what sort of people we were. But why? It's not like you have a choice over who you are going to marry. Those are the rules of the competition!

I: Don't I?

R.: But how? I don't see the good King Janak backing out of his promise if someone manages to string the bow.

I: Yes. If.

L.: Hey! Stop being so mysterious now! Tell us. You said we were friends.

I: The question is: Do you really want to know? Do you really want to string the bow?

L.: What can be so difficult about stringing a bow?

I: Why don't you give it a try now? It's getting dark. The temple would be empty.

L.: Are you challenging us?

I: If you want to take it as a challenge...

We went to the temple. It was dark. We entered via the back entrance even though the front was always kept open, just to avoid being noticed. Lakshman went ahead to look at the bow. I and Ram stayed behind.

R.: Y'know, before I came here, my sole intention was to destroy the bow so that it could not be used by anyone for wrong purposes.

I: Never mind if you got a bride for your efforts?!

R.: Yes, but that was till yesterday. But when I saw you at the palace window today, and after talking to you......I think you are a remarkable woman....but of course, only if you wish to.....

There was a long pause.

R.: Of course, if you don't want.....

I: The bow can't be destroyed unless it is strung.

It was as if three people started breathing simultaneously. Lakshman started laughing. I sensed Ram was blushing and so was I. I threw Lakshman a reproachful look.

L.: Hey! You eavesdropped on us too!!

And then we all laughed.

R.: So how do you string the bow? Have you tried, Lakshman?

L.: Did you really think I would?

I showed them how to string the bow, and then how to destroy it. When I came back to my room, I found it filled with a very beautiful fragrance. It felt as if the Spirit was smiling at me.

The Story of a Princess-4

2008-07-12T09:59:00.005+05:30

They came and failed, all those great, strong warriors. There was hardly any in the whole of Aryavart who didn't try. They would all come twirling their moustaches, bragging of their bravery and strength, and leave telling my father of the impossibility of the task. And I would have to sit through all of this in the upper balcony on my father's orders and also of the Spirit's. "Otherwise how would you know if the person is suited for you or not?", the Spirit would say. I didn't even know what kind of a person was 'suited' for me. All I did know was that none of those princes were. They were loud, proud insolent braggarts who barely showed respect to my father. I shuddered to think how they must treat their subjects.

The Spirit, as per her habit, suggested a way to find out. So I found myself dressed like a servant, going round the palace and the gardens after my suitors. I even went outside the palace gates on some occasions. What I saw, what I heard, changed my life forever.

Most of them did not give a damn about their sub-ordinates. Sometimes, they were only rude. At other times, they would have their servants beaten up for minor mistakes, or misbehave with the female servants. The best of them were neutral towards them, neither kind nor cruel. Since I was dressed as a servant, I myself came too close to danger sometimes. The only thing that saved me was that I was dressed as a servant of my own kingdom, and so they did not have any authority over me.

I remember an incident when one of my own servants came to deliver a message from the king, my father, to one of my suitors. He was in the garden at the time and I hid behind a tree, for fear of being identified. When the girl turned around to leave, the guy caught her hand. The poor girl was petrified, and so was I. What should I do? If I tried to help her, I would be exposed. It would mean embarrassment for my father and the royal house. But if I didn't, would I ever be able to forgive myself? I covered my face and stepped out of the shadows. The prince was so amazed by my sudden appearance that he forgot to hold on tight to the girl's hand and she ran away. I then bowed low and told him that the king wanted to see him immediately. That saved both of us, though my father did ask me later if I knew a servant-girl who was dressed in orange and who covered her face all the time. Apparently, she had played a joke on our guest who was not very amused.

Dressed as a servant of my own palace, I chatted with the servant-girls who came from other kingdoms. I got to know their customs and traditions. Some were the same as my own, and some were entirely different. I sometimes coaxed them to talk about their masters, and they would tell me tales that would chill my heart or make me double up with laughter. It would always become impossible for me to picture that man as my husband after any such conversation.

While digging up the pasts of my suitors, I also learnt about my own kingdom. I learnt about the problems and difficulties faced by my people and understood how the laws of the land affected their lives. I had known Nyay from the point of view of the King. Now I came to know of it from that of the people. I also understood the responsibility of the King to protect his people. This I learned from a very interesting conversation with a girl whose sister was a servant in the royal house of Ayodhya. I'll call her Lata.

Lata: She is an amazing woman. My sister told me about her.

I: Who?

L.: Sumitra. The second wife of the king Dashrath of Ayodhya.

I: What about her?

L.: Imagine the fire of a thousand suns. That's what she is.

I: You mean she's very beautiful?

L.: She is. But she's fire.

I: Don't be so cryptic. Explain in detail.

L.: Well, apparently a sage came to Dashrath's court to ask for his son Ram, in order to get rid of some terrible Rakshasas in the forest where he lives.

I: What are Rakshasas?

L.: I don't really know. Never seen one myself. But from what I've heard, they are terrible creatures who eat the flesh of humans. They have no pity, no remorse. Wherever they go, dead and mutilated bodies pile up as high as the sky. Obviously, Dashrath was very reluctant to send his most beloved son out on a mission like that. When Sumitra heard, she went to him, ablaze with indignition. She not only got him to send Ram with the sage, but also ordered her own son Lakshman to accompany his brother, saying that it is the duty of the kings to protect their people. Lakshman must have been, what, 15 years old at the time? And she didn't flinch, not for a second. I daresay, if Ram and Lakshman had not been allowed to go, she would have taken up bow and arrow herself and gone off.

I: So did Ram and Lakshman succeed in their task?

L.: Well, both the princes were very brave.....

I: You mean they died?

L.: No. I mean that they might be very brave, but they are only boys, and the rakshasas are very strong.

I: So? (Somehow this conversation was really scaring me)

L.: So I don't really know the end of the story, nor can I predict it. I've heard snatches here and there, about them fighting a couple of rakshasas, but that's it. If you want to know the whole story, just wait four more days.

I: Why? Is your sister coming to Mithila?

L.: No. But the princes are.

Later
I: 'fire of a thousand suns', huh?

Spirit: I am with everyone. Some listen to me more than others. Like Sumitra.

I: And what exactly are these rakshasas?

S.: Humans, like you, but so corrupted by evil that they barely resemble who they're supposed to be.

I: Do they really eat human flesh?

S.: Some do. They believe that it makes them stronger. Otherwise, they just slaughter entire villages for fun. The forest-folk are terrified of them. That's why the sage Vishwamithra went to Dashrath for help.

I: So, did the princes succeed?

S.(smiling): Why don't you wait four days? I think Vishwamithra intends Ram to try out Shiva's bow.

I could feel my cheek burning again.

On Aliens

2008-07-12T09:16:00.003+05:30

I was just thinking- there is a very high probability that life exists somewhere out there in the universe, a good probability that it flourishes, a fair enough probability that they are at least as advanced as us, a decent probability that they are better than us technologically. Then why is it that we have not been contacted? I'll tell you why- they are hiding from us. They have to. Humans are known aggressors & conquerors. What do you think would have happened if we had discovered that Mars was inhabitable? We would have packed our bags and gone off to settle there. What would have happened if there was intelligent life there? We would have conquered and captured the poor guys and made them into lab-rats and slaves or worse. Think about it people - what happened when humans discovered America? If we can mete out that sort of a treatment to our fellow-humans, what would we do to an alien race?

All the horrible aliens we see in science fiction, are not really aliens. It's us. We are afraid that a technologically superior society would conquer us because that's what we would do to a less advanced society. We are the monsters, not them. It's time we thought about who we are, who we're meant to be, and what we've become. God's image! Yeah right!!!!

Dear Shibo

2008-04-28T12:25:00.003+05:30

Water-melon in the mess today. Missed you like hell, Shibo. Loved the way you ate them. None of the others could manage it, and you were neater than any of us who could eat them(me, B., Ma, Appa). Hope you are getting loads of water-melon and squirrels where you are.

luv ya lots

PS.: I want to upload a pic of you here. Let's see. :)

Disclaimer

2008-04-26T17:21:00.005+05:30

OK. Now That was Fun. I don't really believe in all these quizzes, for the simple reason that there are way too many people and too few categories. And if all people only belonged to the personality types defined by those categories, I would have scores of clones running about. For example, I found that this Blogthing has only 31 categories of people defined. So people born on 12 April and 12 January are supposed to have the same personalities. Well, I know two people born on these dates, and their personas are poles apart!

So if I don't believe in them, why did I take so many quizzes and why did I bother to put all of them up on my blog at all? Simply because I like what they say about me, and they say exactly what I like to hear about myself at this moment! The people who make these quizzes know that deep down, everyone is a narcissist. And so, every personality type description is highly generalized, but so glowing that you just wanna believe that it's true. Well it is, partly, but then we only remember those parts that we know are true or that we like!

So now that I've got that out of my system, found a perfectly logical reason for spending 1.5 hrs in taking 'personality' quizzes, pampered myself with a 'healthy' round of totally (un)deserved flattery(and enjoyed it thoroughly!), I think it's time I got back to studies. 3 totally killer exams coming up!!

Beware!!

2008-04-26T17:13:00.001+05:30

You Are a Werewolf

You're unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky.

You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you're a total monster.

Very few people can predict if you're going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde.

But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural.

Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature

Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control

You play well with: Vampires

What Kind of Monster Are You?

I have gone totally crazy!!

Agreed :)

2008-04-26T17:08:00.002+05:30

What Your Name Means

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life.

You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip.

People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

hehe....I am lovin this!!

2008-04-26T16:58:00.003+05:30

You Are Disturbingly Profound

You're contemplative, thoughtful, and very intense.

Taking time to figure out the meaning of life is a priority for you.

Because you're so introspective, you often react in ways that surprise people.

No one can really understand how you are on the inside... and that disturbs them.

Are You Disturbingly Profound or Profoundly Disturbing?

And I think I am getting addicted. I have not published all the posts with these 'blogthings', yet, But I am saving them all the same. And I think people are right- I AM a nutcase. :) Hah! Like I care! :P

Black Dress

2008-04-26T16:52:00.002+05:30

What Your Little Black Dress Says About You

You are sexy, outrageous, and daring. You love to push people's buttons.

You are fearless and free spirited. You get people talking... and you don't care what they say about you.

Your style is revealing, trendy, and flirty. You love to look good.

If you were a shoe, you would be: Strappy sandals

The Little Black Dress Test

Nobody is gonna believe this of me!!!

Totally Nuts!!!

2008-04-26T16:47:00.003+05:30

You Are a Cashew

You are laid back, friendly, and easy going.

Compared to most people, you have a very mild temperament.

You blend in well. You're often the last person to get noticed.

But whenever you're gone, people seem to notice right away!

What Nut Are You?

Some people tell me I am a nut-case.....just trying to find out which one. Turns out that I am a cashew! :P Though I really don't know about the second and last points- 'mild temperament'?? Me? Of all people!! And how would I know if my absence is noticed if I am not around. :P

Aha.....only some of it is true :P

2008-04-26T16:43:00.001+05:30

What Your Taste in Chocolate Says About You

You are sophisticated, modern, and high class.

Your taste is refined, but you are not picky.

You are often the first to try something new.

You are friendly, witty, and likable.

You charm is overwhelming. People are enchanted by you.

You have a comeback for anything. Because of this, you seem flippant at times.

You love being around people. Friendships are important to you.

You feel lost when you're by yourself... so you tend to avoid being alone.

The Chocolate Oracle

The color of my Mind

2008-04-26T16:40:00.003+05:30

Your Mind is Purple

Of all the mind types, yours is the most idealistic.

You tend to think wild, amazing thoughts. Your dreams and fantasies are intense.

Your thoughts are creative, inventive, and without boundaries.

You tend to spend a lot of time thinking of fictional people and places - or a very different life for yourself.

What Color Is Your Mind?

hehe.....kuch zyada ho gaya! :P

2008-04-26T04:14:00.003+05:30

Your Birthdate: ******** **

You are a cohesive force - able to bring many people together for a common cause.

You tend to excel in work situations, but you also facilitate a lot of social gatherings too.

Beyond being a good leader, you are good at inspiring others.

You also keep your powerful emotions in check - you know when to emote and when to repress.

Your strength: Emotional maturity beyond your years

Your weakness: Wearing yourself down with too many responsibilities

Your power color: Crimson red

Your power symbol: Snowflake

Your power month: September

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Update

2008-04-22T18:29:00.002+05:30

Went to meet 'Guruji' today. He told us to "Go to hell!", and said that if we were made to stay out till 5 am once, it would be a lesson for us to abide by the 11 0'clock rule in the future. Hah, as if. he doesn't know what he's gotten himself into. Btw, notices for the 11 0'clock rule have come up in some guys' Halls too. If anything, this is only going to get more janta on the roads, starting tonight. I would have really pitied our Guruji if he hadn't been so rude to us today! :)

Latest Buzz from KGP

2008-04-22T07:03:00.006+05:30

There's a new rule in my campus- girls, specifically those belonging to my Hall, can't go out after 11 pm; if they are out after 11, they can't come back in, and have to stay out till 5 am. Well, I should be fair, the original rule was meant for the entire campus, all Halls, boys' and girls' alike. But somehow the administration only chose to implement it in ours.

I am not surprised. It is so typically Kgpian that I am really not surprised. The hypocrisy in pretending that the rule is actually meant for all, and not just girls, and that it would soon be implemented in the guys' Halls too; the sheer insensitivity and irresponsibility in forcing a girl to stay out till 5 am, even if she is 15 minutes late in coming back; cutting off the girls from the late-night facilities in the campus(read the Reading Room & the Night Canteen), not caring whether she has an assignment to submit for which her entire group,which might (and will) include guys, needs to sit down and discuss; all this is all so typically Kgpian. I don't even expect them to understand that she might just want to take a walk with her friends. A girl roaming around at night!! I can only imagine what their ultra-conservative minds would think of a girl like her, a girl like me.

I like my freedom. I am a 22-year old adult, and I like to be the one who takes my life's decisions, I like to be the one who decides whether it is good for me to venture out at this time of the night or not. More than anything, I like to think that I live in a free country which guarantees equality to all. Really, if this rule were implemented on everyone, guys and girls both, then I probably would not have had such difficulty in accepting it.

So the only alternative left for me is to break this rule, 'cos rules can only bind us so long as we let them. Once we learn to just stop caring for them, no matter what the consequences, we can easily take that walk after 11 pm.

:)

2008-04-18T18:09:00.002+05:30

ज़िंदगी में इतनी हँसी भर लें
कि गर आंसू आयें भी
तो आखों के कोने से निंकलें
और हँसी कि सिल्वटों में छूप जायें :)

I Hate Being a Girl!

2008-03-11T00:46:00.003+05:30

Sometimes I really hate being a girl. Today is one of those times. So please bear with me on this one; else you are always free to move away to another page. I won't know, and I won't mind. So, as I was saying, I hate being a girl. Not always, but yes, right now I do. I know there are many nice things about being a girl, so you don't have to remind me of those, even if you care enough to. Right now I am frustrated with the restrictions(spoken and unspoken) imposed on me simply because I am a girl. I am a free bird, and I hate having my sky trimmed to suit the norms of the society. But you know, even that wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't see those very freedoms taken by guys right before my eyes, and no one speaking a word in protest.

They give a number of reasons for this discrimination, but can they deny that this is, in fact, discrimination? They tell me I am vulnerable, and that they are just protecting me by caging me in. But who caused me to be vulnerable? Those very guys who are being allowed to roam about free on the streets. Why should I cover my head? Ask the guys to cover their eyes and faces. Why should I have to stay indoors after dark? Tell men to stay at home. They are the aggressors, not I. Morals? Don't teach me morals. I don't walk the streets ogling at every member of the opposite sex I find. Teach men to think of women with respect too, instead of stuffing our head with all that nonsense.

I want my freedom. And I am willing to take the risks that come with it. My vulnerability is my headache, and it should be up to me to decide what to do and what not to do. I might get into serious trouble someday, or I might not, but that's a risk I am willing to take; and if someday I have to pay the price for it, I will, but have no regrets.

On Akbar

2008-02-28T04:10:00.006+05:30

Recently I saw the movie, Jodha Akbar, and I was struck by the character of Akbar. Well, of course, Hrithik has done a good job, but even without it, I think Akbar must have been a magnificent personality. The way he thought, the way he felt, the way he decided, the way he implemented; he must have been one great ruler. I was watching this movie, and suddenly I was struck- this is the kind of leader I want for my people. I want an Akbar to lead my people, my country to the greatness they deserve.

Why Akbar? No specific reason, except that I was watching a movie about his life and love. But then, even after I thought about it, I didn't want to substitute him for anyone else. True, India has always produced great rulers, but still I think Akbar is the most relevant for the modern world( I am not considering our freedom fighters, Gandhi and Co. I think I'll let them enjoy a very well-deserved break! ). To prove my point, I have two options- either I speak about what qualities Akbar had, or I talk about what qualities I want in my ideal leader. Both should serve my purpose, as I have already stated that my leader should be like Akbar. I think I'll go for the second option. It's safer, and I might come upon some additional 'properties' of the ideal leader in the thought process(Forgive me, I am still not out of the exam mode). :)

So, what sort of a leader do my people need? They need a leader who would truly understand them-their joys, sorrows, hopes, fears and dreams. I know this statement is a bit cliched, but it is true. Knowing the people inside-out, upside-down is the biggest strength of any leader, though I am not sure how many of the so-called leaders of Indian politics have that capability today. But this knowledge is not enough. It has to be coupled with the best intentions and a good sense of right and wrong, otherwise we might have another Hitler. My people need a leader who would know them, but not use that knowledge against them to suppress them, or to divide them, or create hatred in their hearts. This is important, India having such a diverse culture, they need a leader who would want to lead them by uniting them, not by dividing them and playing chess with their feelings and well-being; someone who would have the guts to stand up for what he/she believes in, against everyone, even against his/her own supporters; someone who would be willing to risk everything he/she has achieved in life, all the dreams for the future, for what he/she believes to be right; someone who would not play vote-bank politics but would want to win elections on the basis of the genuine love and faith of the people; someone who would never, ever let that faith down; someone who would have enough experience working for the betterment of the people, from before he/she joins politics and who would continue working for the people even after he/she attains the 'kursi'; someone who would make promises only after sufficient thought, and then would make sure that he/she delivered them; finally, someone who would love India and the Indian people, my people, with all his/her heart.

I think I have summed about all I want in a leader of Future India. If I think of some more points, I'll add them as comments. If you(I am assuming that people actually read this blog! ) desire anything else, please feel free to comment.

Have a good day :)

:|

2008-02-23T18:35:00.002+05:30

Have you ever felt like there are so many thoughts whirling in your mind that it's hard to keep track what leads where? Like a fan rotating so fast that you can't see the blades, and yet staying where it is, stuck in one place.

On Afterlife

2008-02-19T03:25:00.002+05:30

I believe in afterlife. Part of the reason is that I hope to find all the friends, family I lose in this life, in the next. It kinda dulls the pain, knowing that, or believing that, they are all up there somewhere watching over me, and that even if I die I have something to look forward to. And that's my second reason, to have something to look forward to. The third is that I don't wanna believe that once my eyes close, all my memories, all my feelings are gonna be deleted. The fourth is that, because I believe in afterlife, death doesn't scare me so much. I sometimes deliberately put myself into situations where I might get into terrible trouble, simply because I don't believe it will all end.

But many times this belief works against me. Like if I didn't believe in afterlife, I'd have been much more enthusiastic about this one. I'd have fulfilled all my crazy dreams as soon as possible, just in case it were all to end tomorrow. And, of course, when I am frustrated, the thought of death does not guarantee me the oblivion that I need. I guess it's partly keeping me alive. Don't get psyched, I am just another nut-case in front of a keyboard. :)

Come to think of it, what if it does end tomorrow? Would I regret having to die, in my last moments? If I think of the life I have lived and the things I have done, I probably won't. I have had a good life. But what if I think of all things I haven't done? Would I regret leaving then?

Naah.....I guess I'll just take bh. and S. n all for a trip around the country, though I wonder if they have ice-skating rinks up there!

The Sun

2008-02-16T18:17:00.003+05:30

Imagine if someday, the Sun refused to wake up in the morning, saying that it was too cold! Point being, we keep on saying that the world around us is bad, but we don't do anything about it. What we don't realize is that we, and only we, have the power to make a change. We are the Sun. And if the Sun doesn't wake up in the morning, the whole world stays cold.

On Love

2008-02-15T17:01:00.005+05:30

Well, the title must have told you everything-this post is going to be about love. I guess what I am going to write is also pretty much predictable, after all, it is the most worn-out topic in the world! People have written about the passion, the depth, the madness, the pain, the suffering, the sacrifice, the ecstasy and the sheer hope of love. We talk of the laughs we have laughed, and the tears we have cried; of first love, and how it feels like it will last forever, and for a lucky few, actually does; of love lost, and love found; of love hiding behind shy eyes, afraid to speak out; of love denying itself the relief of expression, or of love proclaiming itself from the rooftops; of love that gives, that cares, and brings us up into adulthood; of love that watches over us, always there when we need it, and always trying not to be interfering. Yes, we all have loved, we all have cried, and we all have spoken about love, or written about it, at some point in our lives.

I have loved many times and lost a few too. Today I am going to write about one of my loves(!), let's call her my Sweetheart.

I met her when she was only a month old, but already so active and cute that we, I and my father, immediately decided to take her in. Initially her name was R., but we named her S. when we brought her home. She was the prettiest thing I ever saw, and she was totally dependent on us for her needs. We used to play with her, take her repeatedly in our laps to cuddle her, and she used to look at us with those beautiful eyes of hers, and take part in our fun. I think her eyes were the most beautiful thing about her. They were a dark brown and very expressive. It was almost as if everything she wanted to say, but couldn't, was reflected in her eyes. Yes, she could not speak, but she made up for it in n number of different ways. We knew when she was sad, when she was excited, or when she was angry.

As she grew up, we got closer to each other. She had the same sun-sign as I, and I like to believe that we had a special bonding, a kind of psychic connection, because of that too. I understood her, but more importantly, she understood me. She was very young then, and I didn't expect her to comprehend what feelings I was going through at that point in my life. She might not have, but she did perceive the pain inside me, and she consoled me in her own sweet way.

Those who have been blessed with such sweet creations of God must probably have already understood who I am talking about. For those who haven't- I am talking of my sweetheart, my S. who belonged to dog-kind. She was my love, my baby, my little kid. I brought her up, but in a way, she brought me up too, she made me grow up somewhat. When she was older, I helped deliver her kids, helped her take care of them. She trusted us, and she easily let us touch her new-borns, as if that was the most natural thing to do. She knew when I was sad, or when I was angry with her, and she would come to me and mollify me. It was amazing to see her do it. It was almost as if she could read my mind and speak to me with her eyes.

Dogs have a very short life. My sweetheart left me some time ago. I like to think that she's still around somewhere, hunting some squirrel. I like to think that perhaps one day I will meet her again. I can almost imagine how she'd come to me, with that typical wagging of her tail that made her look like she was dancing. I like to think how I'll gather her up in my arms like a sheep and hug her, and how I would see her love in her beautiful, brown eyes again.

Vande Mataram!!

2008-02-02T00:03:00.000+05:30

A. R. Rahman got it right. Ma Tujhe Salaam.Thai Mannai Vanakkam.Vande Mataram. Vande Mataram. Vande Mataram. Vande Mataram. So beautiful, so perfect. Two words. Vande Mataram. I salute you, my Mother! Vande Mataram! My beautiful Mother. My loving Mother. Vande Mataram. Two words that say so much. You get goosebumps just hearing those two words. Two words that have traveled so far. Two words that literally guided a whole nation's freedom movement. Vande Mataram. Mother, I salute you. What would we not do for these two words? For our Mother? These words have the power to draw people out of their homes and into the streets. The power to unite the people. The power to make them fight as one nation, one people. The power to make them take all the beating, all the torture, and still stand firm. The power to make grown-up men cry like babies. The power to enable even a small child(Azad) take all the whipping, and not let out a sigh. The power to make young people, barely in their twenties, happily embrace the hangman's noose. What immense power!

I salute you, Mother! Beautiful Mother! My Mother! There can be no words to say what I want to say. But you know what I would say, if I could, right? I love you so, so much Mother! I live for you. Someday, I hope to die for you. Will you let me, my sweet, sweet Mother?

:(

2008-01-30T23:40:00.000+05:30

Ok, I am not in a very good mood right now and I apologize to whoever happens to read this post. Actually I was wondering, if I were to disappear today, if I were just erased from existence, would anyone miss me? Would anyone even notice that I am gone? Or would I remain the same invisible person that I am now?

The Story of a Princess-3

2008-01-30T11:59:00.000+05:30

My father did apologize that day. He said that he should not have allowed the priest to talk to me the way he did. He said it was just because he was too amazed to see me being able to use the (supposedly)divine instrument. He also said that he thought it was time I got married. And then he went away.

Over the next few days I came to know that he was really serious in his intention to marry me off. He even kept a competition-an archery competition. The suitor would have to string Lord Shiva's bow. That's it. Sure, send me off with the first fool who comes your way!

However, no fool really did. I sat in the upper balcony and watched them all fail, one by one. I didn't understand why. If a fifteen-year-old girl can string that instrument, surely these famous warriors should have been able to do it long ago.

"They can't do it. Not without your consent." My Spirit was at it again.

I said," And why should my consent be so important?"

S: Because you are the only one who knows how to do it.

I: Oh, please. Everyone knows how to string a bow.

S: Not this one.

I: And how do I know?

S: I showed you. In your dream.

I remembered. Slowly, it all started coming back. Yes, I believe I did know the secret all along.

I: So, what am I supposed to do now?

S: Have fun, of course.

I: Am I not supposed to ever get married?

Suddenly she started laughing, and laughing, and laughing. She said," Up till now you were afraid that you would have to get married. And now you are afraid that you will not be able to get married."

I hadn't known how deeply I could blush, up until that day. When she'd had her laugh, she said," You can choose to share the secret with whomever you wish to marry. He will then be able to string the bow."

Hmmm. That sounded good. That sounded really, really good.

The Story of a Princess-2

2008-01-29T17:32:00.000+05:30

I opened my eyes and found myself surrounded by a thousand balls of fire. They did not feel warm though. Neither were they too bright, as I would have expected them to be. They were just there, bobbing up and down, as if in a dream. I reached out to touch one of them, to see if they would burn me, but I could not see my hands. All I saw was a very brilliant light beam extending towards them. I looked down at myself and saw no body, just the same light. But it was not just light either. It was as if all the brilliance in the world had been condensed together in this nearly solid, swirling, palpable mass of light.

I woke up with a start. What was this dream I was having? Light. Bright light. I looked at my hands. Intact. I touched my face. It was wet. Had I been crying? Ah yes, now I remember. It was the bow I had seen a few days ago in another dream. I saw it again that evening in the palace temple. My father had taken me there for a special prayer. Apparently, I had come of age. I wondered what that meant. Anyways, we knelt down in front of the beautiful bow. I was very excited since I thought I would be getting advanced archery lessons with this bow. So while my father was called away by the priest to discuss some temple issue, I decided to try out the bow.

It was warm when I picked it up, as if happy to meet me. I strung it and gave the string a twang. Oh. how I loved that sound! Archery was my favorite sport and this bow felt like a twin brother. I looked around for some arrows but there were none. Meanwhile the sound of the bow had brought the high priest and my father back to the temple sanctuary. I turned around and found them looking at me dumbfounded, almost horrified. Then, the priest broke out," Hey Shiva! How dare you touch the sacred bow of Lord Shiva?! And prancing around with it too. As if it was a plaything! Bows, Lord Shiva's Bow at that, are not for girls to play with. Do you understand, little girl?" I was almost in tears by then. I thought my father would tell him to shut up, but he just stared at me, like I had committed a sin. Then with a leaden voice, he said," Put away the bow, Sita." I came up to him and offered it to him. But he wouldn't take it, wouldn't even look at me. He just said, "Put it where you took it from." I put the bow on its altar and ran out of the temple and into my room, flung myself on my bed and broke down. Stupid, stupid bow.

I fell asleep crying and that was when I had that other dream, about those suns, for now I knew what they were. Why can't I have normal dreams like normal girls, I thought. Why can't I dream about handsome princes sweeping me off my feet onto their beautiful, strong stallions? Why do I have to dream about the beginning of time and crap like that? As if I am a God!

Aren't you? Someone asked from within me.

Don't give me that crap. I am a girl and I know my place. God indeed! I shot back.

My resident Spirit, for this was she, said," We'll talk when you have calmed down"

I: I don't wanna talk to you.

Spirit: Yes you do. About the bow, and the light.

I: Ok, what were they?

S: The bow once belonged to Lord Shiva. He used it to fight in a very important war against a demon.

I: He was a God. Why did He have to fight?

S: It was because He fought that He came to be God.

I: You mean, He was not divine? Did He not have special powers, like His third eye?

S: Tell me, who is not divine?

I: You told me once that everyone is, but how can that be?

S: Why not?

I: Ok, how about those monsters in the jungle who eat people up, chew up their flesh and scatter their bones among the trees?

S: They don't know who they are. Just like animals. Do you think if they knew their true self, they would do all this?

I: No, I suppose not. If once you start believing that you are good, you actually become good. If you believe you are bad, you become bad.

S: Yes.

I: But even if one believes himself to be God, he can't become one, right? Otherwise all those kings with their pumped up egos would declare themselves gods immediately.

S: No. That status you have to earn.

I: Earn? What do you mean? No one can earn a God status. You are either a God or you are not.

S: Might I make a correction? Not a God. The God.

I: You mean there's only one?

S: Yes. Same spirit. Different forms. Seems like It does not want to stay away from its creation. So comes down here every few hundred years in the form of a being.

I: Like Shiva?

S: Yes.

I: But you said that he had to earn the right to godhood?

S: Yes. If he had not fought for what is right, the Spirit would have left him.

I: This is crazy!!

S: Well, who do you think I am?

I: You are a figment of my imagination.

S(laughing): I might be, and I might not be. Do you really want to risk it?

I: Maybe not. But tell me, suppose you are The Spirit, what am I supposed to do with you?

S: You could start with believing in yourself, for one. Really, that 'girl' crap you keep saying these days is getting onto my nerves!

I: You have those?!

S: I am serious.

I: Sorry. But that fat teacher keeps telling me, "keep quiet, girls shouldn't chatter so much", or, "shouldn't talk in front of men..."

S: Are you going to believe what he tells you or what I tell you?

I: Fine. I got the point. So what you just said means that I am supposed to be God?

S: No. It only means that you are supposed to fight.

I: Against what?

S: You'll know soon.

I: Ok.(with mock sarcasm) Is there anything else I can do for you?

S: Yes, you can wake up. Your father has come to apologize.

:)

2008-01-28T22:06:00.000+05:30

Is it really this simple? One kind word and my whole day becomes happy. A little bit more and I am close to tears-happy tears. Is life really so simple? :) I think it is. I am happy, very, very happy.

Do You Believe?

2008-01-27T21:10:00.000+05:30

Do you believe in fairies? I do. I believe in fairies, in magic, in miracles. I believe that Harry Potter and other kids' stories may have more truth in them than seems at first sight. I believe in angels, and ghosts, but I think that ghosts may not really be bad spirits. I think that they are just people who stayed behind, maybe to wait for the ones they loved, or maybe to just have fun. I believe in there being a Good Place somewhere beyond the clouds where people go when they need a rest. I believe that plants can feel and that animals can talk. I believe that some animals, like dogs and dolphins, are even more intelligent than people. I mean, have you ever known a dog that was not loyal or a dolphin who did not know how to have fun? It is only humans who sometimes turn out that way. Have you never wondered why it is that animals can understand what we say but we can never understand what they say? C'mon, an animal may be trained, but a human? Never!

Nature has left us so many clues as to its true nature, but we never see them. We explain them away with our laws of physics. There is so much magic and wonder hidden under every stone, behind every crevice. But we are enlightened people. We turn away from it. The sky is blue because of refraction. The mermaids that ancient sailors saw were probably porpoises. Pictures of fairies? Probably paper cut-outs. It's almost as if we don't want to believe. :(

??

2008-01-16T18:38:00.000+05:30

Y'know, I feel that I have been angry too long. I've been angry with the condition that the country is in, I've been angry with the selfishness and heartlessness and the utter stupidity(here I go again!) of my country-people. I've been frustrated with the sheer indifference of the society. I've been stumped at the ease with which people fall for the tricks of the politicians. But now I've begun to think, what exactly have I done to change the situation? Write a few blogs, that's it. How have I helped in the situation? Most of the people who have read what I write are intelligent enough to discern right from wrong. So, have I really helped?

AND, not OR....

2007-12-26T14:09:00.000+05:30

Dan Brown in his book Da Vinci Code mentions this Roman emperor Constantine who, he says, gave Christianity its present form. He is said to have merged the beliefs and symbols of the previously existing religions and the newly emergent faith, Christianity, and to have 'stolen' Christianity from its original followers. Now, he did and caused( in subsequent centuries) many more things that were despicable, like the persecution and repression of the supporters of Mary Magdalene, who I believe, existed just as Brown says she did. But I don't want to go into all that right now. Maybe later. What I am interested in is the way he managed to combine two totally different philosophies and make peace amongst his people. I think that's what the world needs right now- to combine all religions in such a way that there are elements of all individual religions in the one big Grand Religion. Wouldn't it be wonderful, if, for example, people in India could be Hindus AND Muslims AND Christians AND Sikhs AND Parsees AND Jains AND Buddhists?....AND instead of OR.

We have been traditionally experts at assimilating other ideologies into our native faiths, otherwise how would you explain the large number of Gods and Goddesses in our country? How would you explain people of India worshiping all Gods as their own, respecting all teachers as their own, whether they be Ram or Krishna or Kali or Nanak or Buddha or Mahavir?

We are a nation of learners. We absorb whatever is good in others. It is time we brought out that same desire to learn and assimilate. Our nation needs it. The whole world needs it. We require an osmosis of teachings from and into Islam, Christianity, and other religions. Only this can bring about a better understanding among the people. Given the escalating levels of intolerance in India, it is imperative that we fulfill this need as fast as possible. It is surprising that given the time these religions have been together in India, this has not already happened.

The Story of a Princess-1

2007-12-19T10:37:00.000+05:30

I don’t really remember my parents. The maids tell me that’s because I was only a few days old when my surrogate father found me lying in a field. Is my father a farmer? Oh, no, no! He’s a king. Then why was he ploughing a field? They tell me it was a religious ritual of some sorts. They perhaps even told me its significance. But I do not remember any of it. All that I remember from that discussion all those years ago, when I first started questioning and thinking about what went on around me, is that my father found me lying in a newly ploughed field, and took me home with him. He was a childless man, and I was a parentless child and we found solace in each other. Because he found me in a furrowed field, he called me ‘daughter of the Earth’, and named me Sita. Because his name was Janak, I was also called Janaki, daughter of Janak.

He loved me like his own daughter. I had all the comforts and privileges due to a princess and received all the education that was imparted to princes in those days, much to the amusement of my maids. Whether Nyay-shastra or sword-fighting, you name it, I had it. I never could really understand why he insisted that I learn all that, until much later, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t enjoy it or wasn’t good at it.

Having so much to do also meant that I didn’t have time for idle thinking, and this I appreciated because this meant not having to think about the mystery of my birth, or why my parents left me alone in that field that day. You see, unlike my father, I never could really believe that I was ‘born of the Earth’, without any human parents. This might also be due to the whispers I heard around me, behind curtains, around a blind corner, whispers that would hush-up as soon as I neared them.

Sometimes, though, I felt like I wasn’t really Sita, the 10-year-old child, but a very, very old Spirit. Sometimes I felt this spirit talking through me, making me say things I would not normally say, things that my father said were way beyond my years, things that sometimes made my teacher tell me off. Of course, I would apologize immediately, but the thoughts of the Spirit stayed with me, making me see things in a totally new light. You could say that I owe my education to this Spirit as much as to my teachers.

The Hypocrisy of Our 'Intellectuals'

2007-12-13T11:37:00.000+05:30

Well, this is going to be a short one. Shobha De wrote a big article in a prominent newspaper that I am subscribed to, telling Taslima Nasreen to leave India. Now, let me clarify one thing in the beginning- I am not interested in debating whether Taslima has been right or wrong in the past. Not interested at all. I am talking about the hypocrisy of our so-called intellectuals, and of our politicians, who are so interested in pandering to the demands of particular sections of society, under the garb of being 'secular'. They don't object to the fatwa against her, nor to the price placed on her head. They don't object to the processions against her. Point to be noted is, if these same processions had been taken out by another community, they would have vehemently opposed the deed. If these people had been truly secular, they would have tried to reason out with the public. They have the power of the pen, after all. They would also have told Taslima not to give any vitriolic comments, if that is the problem. But they don't have the spine to do so. Taslima has not been involved in any mercenary activities, is not an anti-social element, and therefore cannot be asked to leave the country like this, and the people of India and Bangladesh should understand that.

Thou Shalt be Killed by Your Fellow Man....and Brutally

2007-12-11T12:25:00.000+05:30

Reading newspapers is a very bad habit. It makes you see things that you don't want to see, tells you about stuff you don't wanna know about. It makes you see the human race for what it is really- a primitive cannibalistic tribe. Am I being a bit too harsh? I don't think so. Consider this- Is there any other species on earth that is as savage, as ruthless as humans? We kill our fellow humans for something as small as a piece of land, an ornament, something as insignificant as religion. We murder, we pillage, all in the name of God. We suppress the weak and boot-lick those who stronger than us. We are divided into countries, races, religions(Oh my!), regions, sub-sects and for these divisions we are always ready to kill each other. Come to think of it, an alien species will not have any problem conquering us. They have to just let us be and we'll kill us ourselves.

Worst of all, we are not just violent, we are also stupid and dumb. We are as dumb as a flock of sheep which can be led anywhere by the shepherd, even to the butcher-house. Our shepherds are our great leaders, who don't care about anything beyond their Swiss bank accounts. And of course, we are too stupid to see that they are just leading us to our doom. Perhaps the aliens have already collaborated with them. They would be crazy not to.

I'll give you examples from my part of the world. India and Pakistan went their separate ways in 1947 thinking that by splitting the Hindus and Muslims all the problems will be solved. At least Mr. Jinnah thought so. And now look at Pakistan. It is now divided into Shiyas and Sunnis, Punjabis and Sindhis, original Pakistanis and those immigrated from India at the time of Independence. What do you say now, Mr. Jinnah? Wanna make some more splits? India- the Golden Bird- where are your wings now? Someone broke Ambedkar's idol, and there are riots. In Gujrat the hypocritical politicians make election hay. And I am not just talking about Modi. I am talking about all of them. One word from them, the so-called leaders, Congress, BJP, all of them, and the riots would have calmed down. Why didn't that one word come? They probably thought they would look better on camera consoling the bereaved rather than telling the mobsters to stop.

Want another example? Come down to Karnataka. If you are a non- Kannada speaking fellow, you'll be called an 'outsider' right to your face. Thank you, great leaders. Want more? Read a newspaper. You'll hear what's going on in Malaysia. You'll hear about the modern Crusades. You'll hear how brutally people are killed by their fellow humans, for race, for religion.

Imagine what Gandhi would have done if he were there- he would have gone on another Satyagrah. Yes, against his own countrymen, and he would have succeeded. He was a really great and a really misunderstood man. And people of today think it's high fashion to talk crap about him. Get real guys, he was a human, not a God. You think you could do better? Then please go ahead and try. Don't preach from the armchair.

God should not have given humans intelligence. She should have given us wisdom.

:(

2007-12-02T15:45:00.000+05:30

There are times in life when you want to believe the worst about yourselves, when other people's opinion about you sounds true, when your past mistakes start haunting you and try as you may, you can't get out of the feeling of being the most, absolutely most, horrible person on earth. You start remembering all the people you have ever hurt, and you want to wipe their faces out of your mind, but you can't. What is this feeling? Pain? Hurt? Anger? Or fear?

It's fear. Fear of the dopplegangers of the past. Fear of committing the same mistakes again. Fear of getting into the same situation, and being unable to get out. Fear of hurting someone you care about, yet again. Sometimes this fear is so intense that you run away, from that situation, from that person. But sometimes, you stay. And the result is never happy. At least for me, it has never been.

Sometimes being cowardly is a good thing. At least it protects others from hurt, even though it may cut you to pieces.

On a Speech by Sojourner Truth

2007-10-31T14:22:00.000+05:30

Just read a speech by Sojourner Truth, ‘Ain’t I a Woman?’ that was made at a Women’s Convention in response to the comments of some men who talked about how man was superior to woman because he was stronger and had a higher intellect(?), and because Christ was born a man and not a woman and because of the ‘sin’ of the first woman. Awesome, awesome speech. Let me quote.

“I have ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns, and no man could head me! And ain't I a woman? I could work as much and eat as much as a man - when I could get it - and bear the lash as well! And ain't I a woman? I have borne thirteen children, and seen them most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus heard me! And ain't I a woman?”

“Then they talk about this thing in the head; what's this they call it? [member of audience whispers, "intellect"] That's it, honey. What's that got to do with women's rights or negroes' rights? If my cup won't hold but a pint, and yours holds a quart, wouldn't you be mean not to let me have my little half measure full?”

“Then that little man in black there, he says women can't have as much rights as men, 'cause Christ wasn't a woman! Where did your Christ come from? Where did your Christ come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.”

“If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back, and get it right side up again! And now they is asking to do it, the men better let them.”

While modern research has shown that men and women do not differ in their strengths and intellects, I had yet not been able to find a complete answer to this problem, “Why have all the Gods, messiahs, prophets up till now been all men?” Thanks Sojourner, for answering one half. Let me state the second half.

Consider a girl belonging to a middle class family; let’s say, a thousand years before now? Now this girl has prodigious talent. She might be an exceptional musician, or a dancer, or a thinker and philosopher. If she is a talented singer, or musician or dancer, how far do you think her talent would carry her? If she is lucky she would only be singing for her husband. Others, if they are beautiful, would be taken to the king’s court or thrown in public houses to entertain the people. If she is more of the intellectual types, do you think she would be allowed to study, even if she were ten times as brilliant as any boy? Do you think she would be allowed to speak in public and proclaim her views? Never. Forget a thousand years ago, how many of you can say that your own mother did not have to sacrifice her dreams because of social pressures to have a family?

Religion preaches woman to be subservient, because religion itself is created by man. Men tell them that they are inferior to them and they accept, thinking it to be the word of God. I once had an argument with one of my friends. She was insisting that women are inferior to men because her religious text says so. She said that God has made the brain of woman smaller than man, which was also explained by her religious text. It is amazing how far down man can stoop to ensure that woman remains his slave.

Ultimately, there are only two races in this world- man and woman. One the aggressor, and the other subdued, suppressed, tormented everywhere. Even today, in the modern world? Well, it has been observed that even if the couple is highly educated, the wife may have to suffer physical or mental abuse at some point of their marital life. Speaking of Indian society, the husband is usually the dominant partner and usually makes all the financial decisions. The final say on the subject of marriage or education (this among the less educated people) of the children is the father’s. If the couple can’t have children, then it is blamed on the wife. Sometimes the husband does not even deign to take the test! I could go on and on like this, but I think I have made my point.

Honeymoon Travels ;)

2007-10-29T15:35:00.000+05:30

Honeymoon Travels was a really entertaining movie about six couples off to have the honeymoon of their lives. However this is not going to be a film review, 'cos I was particularly interested in one special couple and this blog is going to be about them. They interested me even more because their story was slammed by almost everyone of the viewers as being too fantastical. You guessed it pal, I am talking about the superhero couple.

Now, this was a couple who had never had a single fight in all their days of courting/ friendship. That in itself was hard to swallow. But why did the director have to bring in the superhuman part? 'Cos that really made the whole thing indigestible. Or did it? Somehow I feel that their being super-heroes makes complete sense. I think that what the director wants to say is that there can not be a single couple in the world who has never had a fight, or who has such perfect synchronization in their actions and thoughts as these two had. So to expect that one will never have arguments with one's spouse is pure fantasy and one must learn to accept this. Only a divine/superhuman couple can have such a state of bliss, not us mortals. So lower your expectations a bit, people! Fights and arguments are going to be part of your love life, but how soon you get over them and make up are probably gonna determine the state of your marital bliss! Time to kick those egos out the window, I suppose! :)

Hope

2007-10-27T18:39:00.000+05:30

Life gives us many setbacks, tosses us around, tortures us till even tears become a luxury. We curse her and call her names. We beg her to just let us die if she hates us so much. But she just goes on as if our miseries don't matter to her at all. Just when we have given ourselves up to a life of pain and sorrow, suddenly one day the storm clears and lo, we are in the Promised Land! We realize that she has been our friend all along; we were just too short-sighted to see it.

Whether in love or friendship, in business or personal relations, it always helps one to remember that nothing is permanent, however much we may(or not) want it to be, or however hopeless it may make us feel. There's always an end to everything- to both happiness and sorrow. So if we are experiencing sorrow today, we might cheer up because tomorrow may bring us joy. And if we are happy, we should sober down and think of investing in some love, for the rainy day.

There's this prayer that my father always quotes to me when I am down and it never fails to bring life into perspective:
'God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we can not change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.'
I hope it will do as much for others too. :)

Mom Rocks

2007-10-19T11:23:00.000+05:30

One of the few things that can never be duplicated in this world is the taste of one's mother's cooking. I have tried numerous times and no dish is the same as it would have been had my mom but just touched it once. Last night I and my mom made one particular dish together, and man, it turned out so much better than when I make it on my own. I told her this and she just laughed it off. I wonder where mothers get it from!

The First Post

2007-10-17T12:05:00.000+05:30

Well, I suppose the first post must start off with a bang. But right now I am in no mood to write, even though when I thought of creating this blog, there were a million things I wanted to speak to you about. So this, here, is going to be the first post for this blog. May the Lord, God, be with us.